Units of a day.

Again Again, 24 hours in a day is way too short.
Imagine I divide my hours into units a day -  something inspired by about a boy when I rewatched it.

Sidetrack - on radio this morning, I am pretty certain that the guy doing the voice over for the Shell sense advertisement is the same as the Samsung Imagine advert. For a while, I thought they were the same. The way the words were emphasize were the same too.

Back to maintrack
9 units are spent working
8 units sleeping

This leaves me 7 units.
I take 1 unit to get to work.  2 units to get back, eat and bath.

That leaves me 4 units.
Sounds like a lot. Aha, that is assuming I leave work on the dot.  

Lets assume that
4 units - I spend 1 unit devouring the papers.
3 units left.  1 unit surfing the internet.  
2 units left. Well I am not abt to justify this 2 units because my plan above assumes everything runs like clockwork. By right, these 2 units should not exist. If they did, I would have my magazines to read, TV, phone time which will not be enough.

Why Why Why is this barely enough even when I leave work on the dot.

Well, the reality is I do not leave work on the dot.
That leaves my 4 units to be either 3 or 2 units.
Sigh sigh. I had this feeling of exasperation last night when I couldnt do anything except read the papers.

Now I feel a little dumb, cos all i did was to replace the word hours by units. I am sure Hugh Grant meant it differently when he used units.

Bits and Pieces

So,  the power supply isn't the problem. Changed my power supply but computer still refuses to boot up. Sigh. I hate having to depend on my work laptop. The idea of getting a mac has been crossing my mind. My rational self says no and that repairing the motherboard is prob way cheaper. My vain self says I want a mac for everything that is cool. Too bad I am not exactly feeling very rich now. Maybe I should walk across the road during lunch and shade 4 digits.

I havnt swum for the 12 days I was away and my hair feels smoother. I always thought that my hair quality was somewhat good, considering the amount I swim. Apparently, it has degraded over the years and now I feel the familiar feeling I had years ago.

Mid week.

 

Home

Home finally.

Then, I heard the new ndp song by Kit Chan on TV and it struke a chord in me. I always have been a sucker for ndp and the ndp songs. I like Home a lot, and now I think I have a second fav in There is no place I rather be.

Which is strange, because I enjoy returning to Singapore, in fact I am always very happy to be home in Sg, but home as in sg home but not my house home perse. Everytime I return house home, I get flak and tons of it which makes me wonder why I want to be home in the first place. I am still feeling that way. However, I do enjoy cruising down the pie from Changi in the cab.

Finland and London was a Blast. Finland Tampere was rather boring considering that Alboy was in conference the whole day long leaving me with ample time with nothing to do. I soon got used to and even enjoy walking in a town where there were so few people. There was so much space and it was just great. Nice cool weather.

London too, eating a sandwich and apple pie, a piece of choco cake in the park opp the London eye was just out of the world. You can never do this in the sweltering humid, ideal for mosquito breeding weather here. But in London, it was just so relaxed and nice.

We walked in a park where swans ducks pigeons flew boldly around us. Sat by the pond at a very nice cool 15 degrees and watched the world go by. It was just like in the movies.

Minus the fact that the pound was just so expensive - I had a really really good time.

cold and hot

I am becoming a fin. When I arrived I was freezing like crazy, now 20 degrees is hot to me. I can actually go out with just one jacket. Its amazing.

Have not stepped out today. Hopefully the weather is scorching hot today in finnish terms at 20 degrees.

Kinda bored here actually. Tampere is a super small town. I walked around like for 4 hours and now I can go ard without a map.

Going to Gone

Moodless. Moodless. Moodless.

Waiting for time to pass. Waiting for time to pass.

Waiting for email reply. Waiting for email reply

Want to leave. Want to fly.

 

But not particularly excited. Just want time to move on.

chirp chirp

I been reading Karen Cheng blog and she is just so inspiring. I been reading for some time now but on a lazy Sunday afternoon I just started reading entries from before. She inspires me. She makes parenting seem like such a joy. Totally opp from whatever stories my mum tells me. Sometimes I wish my mum stop doing such things. Its poisoning me. Her husband comes home at 5pm everything, and still has time to take care of kids. I do not think it happens here in Sg. If you reach home by 8pm I supposed its a wonderful thing already.

I know she probably has her tiring times too but the fact that all her entries are so bright and chirpy is just so nice. Its like an escape from my own world. I should make a conscious effort to blog about happy things. Like how today I swam faster than this 1.8m tall ang moh. Like how my boss is not around and I have been doing rubbishy work today. Like how I convinced myself that even though I stare at my computer screen doing nothing, I am doing work as long as I am listening to podcast by top company management from the ipod. Ain't that wonderful.

 

Dollar and Sense

I should be sleeping now. But I am not.

I had a lousey evening. It usually happens when I need to buy something and Alboy is around. You see, we have very different notions about how much a thing should cost and how much I would be willing to pay for it. Alboy just have this mindset that the more expensive something is, the higher the quality. Usually that is the case, but the question I always have is, Do you need that high quality. Sometimes you are just paying for the branding. Sometimes he gets totally biased and insist it is the better make even before opening the package. Gosh, I hate those moments. When its his turn to buy stuff, i just do my tsk n walk away because after all it is his money and its not for me to approve his purchases.

Its a different story when I need to buy stuff. I do not consider myself a cheapo but I am highly unwilling to pay top dollar for something. I am much more pragmetic. If something performs its function and is not too ugly looking, I do not need to buy the most expensive one.

So it always happens like this. Alboy accompanies me to look for my item. Take the ipod skin for example. I was only willing to pay 20 dollars max for a silicon cover. But Alboy always have to insist that the cheap silicon covers are no good. Personally at 20 bucks, I do not think its cheap. Also, I hate to make my purchase at the first shop, I like to shop around, walk around, know that I am not cheated because I can buy the same thing at a neighbourhood store at 80% of the price. I get into this mangzhang mood cos Alboy just picks things beyond what I am willing to pay, then puts me into this difficult spot. Then, I go really silent and blackface then he gets mad too. I end up paying for something overpriced and feeling shitty about it.

Something similar happened again. Sigh. I should stop shopping with him.

Another story, at timberland, I think a yr or so ago. I need to get this moisturizer for my suede bag. Timberland was the only place I could find the moisturizer. Buy the moisturizer I will cos I really did the hunting. Then came along this one stupid brush. I knew I didnt need the brush. But Alboy insisted I will need the brush some day. My argument at that point in time was, When I need it I will buy it. I do not even forsee myself needing the brush. I didnt know what happened but I paid 8 bucks for the brush anyway. Its not really a matter of money, but now when I look at the brush in mint condition sitting on my shelve, I feel super irritated.

I should shop with people who understands this.

For the soul mate that he is, I do not ever think he understands this.

Sigh. I should really go sleep or risk being zombified at work tomorrow. But, like I care.

Random

Heard "I never promised you a rose garden" on my way to work and man, it was the most awful song I heard in a long time.
Not the song per se, cos I love that song but today's song was sung with absolutely no feeling. I thought it must be a cover, then I was thinking to myself, it seems like a song sung by a guy to a girl so I was pretty sure what I heard was a cover. Did a google the moment I got into the office and found out it was sung by a woman. Now I am a bit disturbed.

Feeling dazed on a tuesdays is not a good sign. Blame Prison Break. 5 episodes in a row is so not good for health.
I need sleep.

 

Of mice and stupid people

Today i think, erm erm, I havn't blogged for some time so I should write something really nice.

But now, I am in the eragon mood where I want to mentally kill some people. Make it more violent this time, I want to physically take their heads and smash it against the wall till the blood makes a mess on the floor.

How can some people be so self centered, think they are so damn bloody smart (worse still, keep refering to themselves as smart which really reafirms the fact that they think they are smart) but yet be so dumb. I hate people who pick and choose what they want to belive. Sometimes, I think i should just focuse on my job and not bother but its just not me. I have this knack for telling people off and confronting them like a raged bull when I totally do not agree. Sigh. Poor me.

To happier things, I finally filled in my spreadsheet and realised I spent a lot of money this month. Its double the amount. If money spent were an indication of my social life then I should be doing pretty well but somehow I do not feel so. It does not help that the GSS is ongoing. I seriously do not think I be buying anything unless it is really really cheap which it never is.

My heart feels rather knotted. I think its cos of imbeciles and work. Sometimes I feel like just quitting but I don't think i will. Not yet at least.

A Perfect Morning.

A perfect morning

-  Wake up feeling totally refreshed. That means 12 hours of sleep at least. I just read somewhere today that waking up refreshed is the best feeling in the world. I paused to think  about it and I think ya, its actually not bad. Too bad I peel myself out of bed almost every morning.

- Wash up, Have a pippin hot breakfast. Preferably like Prawn Noodles or Wanton Noodles.

- Settle oneself down on the sofa and slowly reading through the papers.

- Assuming all these take place in nice cool weather, it would be time for a little nap or some light chore like making the bed. Else, take a long hot bath or go for a swim.

- Juice some fruits for drinks.

- Sleep/Watch TV

Sigh.
 

An Entry

Time to blog since I have some spare time.

It’s been a crazy week for me workwise.
On the social note, I have been caught up with watching 24 now that I have completed prison break. I do not like it at all. Not the show. But the act of watching TV.

I only have so many hours a day, watching television disrupts my reading routine. Eversince I started Prison Break, I have not been able to complete my Magazine readings before the next issue arrives. It is pissing me off big time. My book - I read only 5 pages a day before I get too tired and conked off. Anyone would, try reading a book at 3am after 3 hours of telly. It’s so disgusting.

I am going to just complete the first season of 24 and stop there. It’s not that interesting anyway. The rest if I watch, it be like a Saturday Afternoon thingy, no more messing with my reading.

Spent 230+ on Mother's Day Lunch. Sometimes I think that my siblings are the ones who are enjoying it most. I mean, they just wait and depend for me to make reservations, go have a nice lunch , make mum happy and mum doesn’t question them on their absence of presents. I should make them pay a nominal amount but then I would surely get flak for imposing that.

Have recently been enamored by the T100 and ipod Video 80G. My mum was almost going to buy the 80G for me (in partial exchange for LV) but they had no stock. Darn. Now that we left Epicenter, its never going to happen again.

Would put them on my Birthday Wishlist since I do not foresee myself spending so much money. Have to put myself on Budget. Esp since I have yet to book my London Finland hotels. That is going to cost at least 1k.

Things I need to do this week
- Pack my clothes cupboard and decide if I really do need an extra cupboard
- Pack my table. I cannot understand how my table now is messier than when I was actually using it to study.
- Pack my room. I think I have more wires entangling everything.
- Get another component input cable so I do not have to manually plug and unplug them everytime I switch from TV to DVD. Than k goodness I have some substantial knowledge about electrical stuff.
- While I am on that, install Wireless control for my light switch! Not high priority since I would have to shut off electricity to my whole house. Do not think Dad would be very pleased.
- Finish reading all my backdated magazines.

Single or not?

Attended a wedding today, watched Jennifer Aniston Rumour has it , heard 2 friends propose and here are my thoughts on getting hitched.

I still do not understand it. Or rather, to put it more honestly, I don't think I understand myself. I still do not know what stand I take about marriage. More of these reunification just make me think deeper to what I really want. I think I want to be together with Alboy for a long long time but yet, I am afraid of what the future will be. I am afraid I will be bored and take flight. I also do not want to give up all the little luxuries I get when I stay at home.

Since I have been travelling quite a bit this yr, 6 countries in 4 months, I realise that i am always rather happy when I am out. Maybe its a form of escapism, or maybe I really just enjoy taking in the sights.

Maybe its because I am not making much new friends these days that I spend time with Alboy. Maybe its the other way around. I enjoy being with him a lot. But, i just hate the empty feeling I get when I am alone because he is not free. It makes me feel useless and needy.

I seen a lot of new couples happily together at the start but later they hate each other like crazy. How did it happen? How can you hate someone you liked so much previously?

On Alboy, I know he is a keeper, thats for sure. Which guy will endure me screaming and hunging up the phone on him when I get irritated(which doesn't happen often) , then leave it alone only to sms tease/confront me about it and later buy me ice cream?? I know a lot of guys who would either have flared up too, or try to 'reason' with the girl making the girl admit she was wrong.

Two of my friends just did amazing proposals. One took 6 months to make a mtv and used to to propose in a ktv, the other arranged an elaborate fancy dinner and popped the qns with a big ass tiffany ring. It was woa. But the strange thing is, I didnt feel like i wanted any of those things, infact i think i was a bit terrified.

Jennifer Aniston in Rumor has it was somewhat like that. It took her major awakening in her life before she finally knew what she wanted. I don't want to be like that. I don't want to be have to go through that but yet I feel like I want to feel what I really want before I just go along with the flow of things.

A lot of rambling. I still do not know my point of this post. Maybe next time I have to structure it first to have it make more sense.

My updated World Map

Paradise on earth

Maldives was lovely. Paradise. Heaven on earth. The most beautiful place I have been.

It was the only place where I wanted to hop onto a plane and fly back immediately right after I landed back in Singapore. When I close my eyes, I still can picture it vividly. I want to remember every moment of it before the memory gets blurred. It was just, perfect.

Our room was about the cheapest (but yet still very expensive imho) on the resort but yet it was lovely. The back of the room was a glass wall with wooden blinds. Open the door and you have this neat patio area afterwhich you walk out to pristine white sand and crystal clear waters. Yes, the beach at your backyard. It was just surreal. The waters were so clear that you can see fishes swimming to shore. On one day, dophines actually swam really close too.

At night, the sky was just a blanket of stars. Clear skies whole night. Beats all the stargazing sessions I been. The whole sky of stars just there for you. In my rush to pack the night before, I forgot my starmap so I could only recognise the major constellations which kinda pissed me off cos there were just so many of these jewels in the skies. I had told myself to pack it in but totally forgot.

I slept at 10pm everyday and wake up at 7, feeling all refresh and nice. The routine was so laid back, wake up , eat a hearty breakfast. Activity at 10+11, then back to shower and change nice nice for lunch, then activity again either at 2 or 4 then shower and change nice nice for dinner.

There were so many koreans there and boy do those ladies know how to dress. They were dresses I would wear to weddings to go on board a boat, complete with kitty heels. Its a wonder they didnt capsize on board. They kinda inspired me to dress up, so I had fun dressing up during mealtimes. Mambo had a closing down sale just 2 days before I left and I bought quite a bit of stuff there which came in handy. Alboy packed so many shirts and berns/jeans, I didnt even know he packed so much, he was always so nicely dress for meals too. That vain boy even brought two watches, one for meal one for rough use. I almost fainted when I found out.

What did I do there?
I went sailing, or rather sat on the sail and the guide jaga the boat, snorkelled, suba dive, wakeboard, fishing, did a half day island hopping thingy, went sunset dophin watching. It was just perfect, going out on the boat, sea breeze ruffling your hair. All the photos turned out fantastic, mainly because the scenary was so great it didnt even matter if you scrowl in the photo.

Fishing was an experience. There were so many fish out there. We were just provided a reel of nylon string and some tuna as bait, throw into the water and fish. Alboy caught this huge fish, or rather the standard size there, the length of the fish was from his ankles to his knees. I caught a tiny red snapper though. Best part is, they cooked it for you for dinner the next day. It felt a bit strange though, to be so involved in the killing and eating of the fish. A bit cruel cos you could see the poor fish struggling, hooked through its nose/eyes and then eating it the next day.

Snorkeling was just out of the world. There were stingrays, turtles , sharks, octopus and plenty of multi coloured fish. The marine creatures mentioned were just an arm length away. It was that plentiful and nearby. I even managed to touch and rub the shell of the turtle. Was a bit afraid of a Steve Irwin when I was swimming ontop the stingrays because I knew there were barely a meter below. In fact, we saw more snorkelling than scuba diving.

Wakeboarding. My first try. Everytime we do any of these sea sports in Singapore, you will land up smelling like the longkang water the whole day even if you give yourself a thourough bath. Here, the scenary just makes falling into the water fun. Clean water, nice backdrop. Photos turned out amazing too.

It was just amazing. No wonder so many people go there for honeymoon. Oh, we told the agent that we were on honeymoon too to enjoy the perks like free fruits yada yada....and when we first arrived the first night, I got a shock of my life. They used leaves, flowers to create this "happy honeymoon" words on the bed, then flowers scattered all over. I was just speechless for words. The bell boy was like "oh your honeymoon" and I wanted to say nononono, but I guess my jaws were just too wide open and too stunned to react. Alboy then took over from there and I didnt really know what was exchanged.

I want to go back there again.
Would post photos if not cos I am too lazy to figure out how the photo thing works. Don't have the software I used to use now that I am using the laptop.
Would show to all when we meet up. You have to see it. It just mega pretty.

The slightly ouch factor was that everything was so expensive.
Accomodation was 2.2kSGD , Spending amout there(inclusive of food and excurisions) was 1.2kUSD. Airport tax was 400SGD. Thank goodness I redeemed the tickets else that would have been an additional 1.2k SGD. Just this alone was like 4.5k SGD, just for 4 wonderful nights. Very expensive. But it was really worth every single cent imho.

I want to go back!!

The Wheel turns...

So, its one of those days where you feel just tired, then you are not sure if you are emotionally tired or could be a physical strain. You think for a while, then decide its a lethal combination of the two. Mind over body you tell yourself, but alas, the mind is weak. The force is not there.

Things have progressed to a stage where I hardly feel much. Let it be, Whatever, I don't care, Even if I do, do I have the power to do anything you ask. Ziltch.

Yet, the wheel of life has to continue turning, dateline has to be met, else you get annihilated, you get weeded out. You persist then you find out certain things that make you $ad. Ya, $ad. A new word I learnt. A useful one.

A walk to remember

A walk to remember was on TV today. Although I think Mandy Moore sucks, the male lead was quite eyecandy.

Anyway, this show brings back memories. A point in my life where I did not know what the hell I was doing. I watched this show at JEC like 5 years ago with a guy, this quite hunky guy. It was crazy. I didnt know I was doing. The guy was hunky as agreed by most people in the varisty and somehow I landed myself with him. I think he treated me like his gf and now I cannot even remember if he tried to hold my hand.

All i remembered was, during the show I was like wtf, after the show I was like, how do I get rid of him. Which was strange because I sorta invited trouble myself. I 'dissapeared' and remained uncontactable for like a month from him after that. It was sorta end of story. I felt bad, am reminded of how bad I felt today.

Things that come back to haunt you.

My updated Map of the World

Back home!

Glad to be back in Sunny Sg.

Barcelona was mainly hotel. I only got to see Sangrada Familia, ate some tapas and surprisingly good food. Water there is always with the 'con gas' choice. Its refreshing although all the gas made me feel a little flatulant. I think I prefer my water still. I am still undecided how I feel about water with gas.

France was okok. The touristy attractions were okok. Maybe cos I was alone and it was raining most of the time, leaving me super duper cold and miserable. Paris Disney was suprisingly small, like HK. Half a day was enough.

The driver who drove me from the hotel told me "Paris is a place full of magic".

On my way back, there was a wedding ceromony and he went "This is a sign for you, when you get back to Sg, you will get married".

Later, there was this huge bird shit splattered all over his window, he thinks its a sign too. I told him that in Sg, if you have bird shit, you probably become very rich soon. He immediately went" This is a sign, when you get back to Sg, you will get married with someone very rich, Paris is full of magic".

When we reached the airport, there was sirens going off and he went "This is a sign for you, when you get back to Sg, you will get married with someone very rich who is the chief of the police. Paris is full of magic".

I was like hurhurhurhurhur, and in a hurry to get out of his car to grab some grub because I was starving. Starving really, so hungry that I thought I knew how a kid in Somalia feels like. I had not eaten in hours cos everything was so expensive. I had initially planned to go back to the hotel because the neighbourhood is cheaper there but my driver came early, leaving me with no time to eat.

BTW, nothing the driver said has come true. I don't think it will anyway.

I been super duper tired since I came back. Had to attend a 2 day meeting, then work work work. Today I slept 16 hours straight. I didnt even wake up. My dad came and shoke me "eh, 4pm already" I was like..what.... I was planning to sleep in..but like till noon. Not 4pm. and by 6pm, I was ready to go sleep again.

The good thing is,
-I am going to watch Phantom on Sunday
- I am going to Maldives in two weeks. Finally finalised the trip. Its so expensive. 2.2k just for accomodation, and its the second cheapest one. Thankfully, the tickets are redeemed.
- I also booked my tickets to Finland and London in June.

That leaves me so so so broke. My cc actually got rejected when I tried to pay for dinner.

Gone again

I'm really tired.

Going to Barcelona in a few hours then Paris.
Sounds fun but I am really tired. God knows what is going to happen in the meeting in Barcelona and the idea of walking around in Paris alone does not excite me. Plus, boss just had to schedule his bi annual meeting right after I come back leaving me with no time to prepare. Sigh.

On top of that, I just got back from KL PG and TH. 2 weeks out with one week in between and I am gone. I kinda miss my bed. So bad till I am working on my laptop on my bed now. The deal is to work till the battery power runs out and I will stop procrasinatoing and pack for Spain. Its so freaking cold there I think I will freeze and whither. 15 degrees is too cold for me but I risk looking like an idiot there all fully wraped like a ba zhang. Who cares.

The High Life

Its 3am and I just got home. I'm kinda tired and still have to hook up my DVD player because I must watch the last 10 mins of The Devil Wears Prade but I just have to word this before the moment is gone.

I just found out I actually love the night life so much. I have always been a night creature but mostly I am stuck in my room, recently I had the opp to be out and best of all , at the wheel. The feeling is tremendously. The first time I did that, i had a high that lasted 2 days.

If I had the wheel more often, I properly be really really really tempted to get my own set. I think I have arrived at a stage where I probably can afford a car, abeilt I do not get to save as much as I want. If I had taken the job offer last yr, my car would be one year old now. Much as I like to be driven, the feeling of being in control is fantastic. I think this must be mainly due to the facts that I drive at night and there is no traffic. I can swerve across 3 lines and do perpendicular turnings with it without having to neogoitate the congested arteries of day time traffic.

I love being able to lead my own life and forget about work. I been reading watching high fashion shows, not by purpose but rather concidentally. I need that kinda passion, energy and purpose for life that the characters have. Now I just lug myself to work. At least now I have started something on the side that is supposed to burn the fire in me. I am getting quite old and need to be on top of my game.

Recently I been looking and buying pretty things and its getting me onto a high as well. I have this huge shoe obession now and it doesn't help that Alboy is supporting me on this. He believes that a girl cannot have too many shoes and thinks that 30 plus shoes are cheap. Even up to less than a hundred is fine for him as long as the design is nice, cos he says that guy shoes cost a whole lot more. I think this is someone who has like what. 3 Kenneth Coles? and has to get a new pair to match his new trousers?

K, need to go hook up the DVD and wake up by 9.30 tomorrow. Am on Leave. Happiness. This has to be one of the best CNY.

I am delidrious.

*note- i'm too tired to go thru spelling n grammer edits. So be it.

My world travel map

Ya, so this is where I been and lived. Feels empty to me.
The naming of the places got messed up. I wanted the city, country format but because the maps were as usual as not as detailed in the asia region, it was hard to pinpoint exact locations so I just left them as countries in Asia. Want to go Europe

Updates

Just a short one, more like an update.
Been in office till midnight everynight for a week already and counting. Super tired. Going to Phil on Sunday back on Friday then its cny. Humongous stuff going around at work, working with stupid people makes everything doubly hard to do. Can't wait for massage + facial. Can envision myself sleeping there,
Tataz

Turn turn turn turn

Its a cycle. Maybe its hormonal, maybe its the weather. I just feel slightly depressed come Sunday nights. The good thing is I have gotten used to it.

Am supposed to be studying for my malay test tomorrow but I did none of those. I checked my email, was hijacked to friendster and now am too tired to absorb anything. Methinks me will just head straight to bed.

My colleagues have been adding me to friendster and they have been putting my photo up on their profile. This sucks. I want to be faceless on the net. I have sucessfully asked all my friends not to put my photo on their blogs and these idiots just keep posting picture after picture of me. Sucks. Don't you need your friend's permission to post their picture? Maybe I am self centerd of what, I never ever put my friends picture on the www.

Actually, I wil not mind it so much if it were a group picture and faces small and unclear. I hate to be identified like this, esp if I were in a V neckline dress that reveals cleavage. Maybe I will go ask them to pull the picture down. Some of them are profile pictures somemore. OMG.

Its going to be a crazy week. I do not have such a good feeling abt it. I just want friday to come and go fast. Friday, finally. One city down another 4 more to go. Just thinking of it makes me pant. In another post, I will write about what I really think about. In short, its kinda pointless. We are but the labour to make the wheels turn.

Time traveller's wife has been so far so good. Sometimes I do wish I had the ability to see into the future, abeilt without the losing of clothes part.

OK. need to go at least read some malay. Cikgu thinks I'm his top student. No Joke. But thats just because I am the most serious about it. The others skip classes all the time. Am going to terribly dissapoint him tomorrow.

A good read.

Today was one of those days that I wake up not knowing which day of the week it is. It has been a long time since I felt this way. On hindsight, I felt the same way on Sunday but since it was a Sunday, I gladly and promptly fell back to sleep.

 I bought The Time Traveller's Wife and am immensely happy with myself. Now I have a nice book to indulge in instead of catch 22. That I will slowly read, I plan to finish that too since it does have rave reviews. At least that keeps me happy for the time being.

Bought a pretty dress at 24 bucks too. Quite a steal. The problem with me is I keep buying dresses telling myself that it is for my malay colleague's wedding in March. But everytime I see a  nice dress, i keep telling myself that I will wear this dress instead of the previous. Now I have like 3 different dresses for the wedding. Thankfully they are all in the 20-30 dollars range. Don't need to be so fanciful for void deck reunification.  

Need a good book.

Now that I finished reading eldest, I feel slightly empty. I have been so used to being transported to another world everynight and now I feel a bit sad. Embarked on catch 22, but I keep falling asleep after 2 page. I need a better book.

I watched Apocalypto. It was gruesome - the wrong movie to be sucking on a popsicle. I felt like puking halfway. Usually gory doesn't have an effect on me, but eating and watching at the same time was a tad too much. Good thing the lead looked a bit like Jerry Yan. Next time I will just watch a bimbo show - something like legally blond.

Work is going to be trying this week. I think I made some bad blood in office. I have a feeling some people out there are starting to hate me. Everyday i feel like a racehorse running towards the finishing line, but with 2 huge sandbags pulling me down. I don't understand some people really. I hate to sound arrogant but I really think their procesing and thinking capabilities are much slower than mine. Certain things that to me are only a minor hicchup, they spend hours agonising over it, with no apparent progress in sight.

Going to do a mini asean tour coming feb-mar. Hopefully after that life will be smoother. I am also convinced everything I touch turns to rock. Since the start of this yr these things have broken - house heater, scv box in my room, hdb lift(had to walk up and down for 2 days), camcorder (twice), computer (2 computers, had a major time resurrecting them).

On a happier note, I have been swimming much faster. Partly cos I get so angry with above mentioned colleagues that I have so much pent up energy to expend during lunch. I feel my muscles hardening and I am darker. Its strange, I swim during lunch all the time but only start getting darker recently. Maybe its because I been going at noon instead of 1pm, not sure if an hour really makes that much difference.

p/s.Thanks moi for the comment - when you are less busy lets go shopping or do nails or something.

The mental mind

I waited for 40 minutes at the busstop only to find out that I missed the last bus. I meant, it was only 12.10am so I thought I had a chance, after all the bus came from Toa Payoh and I was at KAP. I saw the bus going the other direction. All the other buses came but mine. Eventually someone sms me and I asked him to checked the timing, the bus left TP at 1130pm. Strange, I must have just missed the bus. It was ridiculous. I had to take a cab, which I initially resisted because I only had 2 dollars with me and refused to spend more money on cabs. Cabbed I did, paid with NETs, the surcharge is only 30 cents compared to the pricely 15% with credit cards. Felt so duh, accumulated even more negative energy in me with no outlet.

All this negative eneregy has been in me. I know not the reason. Work has been trying but I usually am not affected by work since I refuse to let my life rotate around it. Have been more bored with Alboy recently, its just the routiness of things. Meet late, cannot do anything, dinner home. Screamed and short fused at him a couple of times, not my fault entirely. He has been having a trying time at work too. Sometimes I consider myself really lucky, because when I am in the mangzhang mood, he actually is not ignorant of it and is rather sensitive. Even puts in extra effort to soothe me. I am sure all the other guys out there would have went ballastic. At least I can easily think of at least 5 guys who will do it.

Been reading eragaon and I am fasinated with the idea of how strong the mental mind is. You can easily kill troops by just thinking and using the correct ancient word. I mean, how cool would it be if I can mentally maim my uselsss colleagues every morning.

I went mental shopping today, in preparation for cny. I didn't spend any money because I felt rather poor after attending all the weddings. My mental purchases were - a pink sequined top ($40), a long sleeve top ($40), two pairs of Charles and Keith shoes ($60) , 9west shoes ($108) and Time Travellers Wife at 40% discount ($12). It easily came up to $250. See, how fast money is spent. Sigh.

I think I will actually buy these items (except 9west - too pricey) , maybe later or at a time when I feel richer. Oh, whoever who wants to buy Charles and Keith shoes, please hold on and let me know. I decided I want to qualify for the discount card. I need to spend $120. Since the shoes are pretty affordable, it does make sense to qualify for the discount. The newer designs are actualy pretty decent.

I need more mirth in life.

January's first monday.

I feel as if my weekend were robbed from me.
First I had another wedding to attend. Seriously, I am soo soo soo soo sick of weddings. Esp colleague's wedding. I would be forced to go, forced to give a decent ang bao, forced to mingle and smile on a Saturday. I think I deserve my break.
Then I had to wake up early on Sunday to go to this Fengshui talk. Seriously, after 8 hours of fengshui, everything just sounds the same. Put this that in your room to prevent this that from happening. Apparently, its going to be a not bad yr for my zodiac sign although it is in indirect clash with the grand duke of jupiter..hahaha.
It didn't let up at night, the warm weather prevented me from sleeping, so I switched on the aircon and my nose acted up. Perfect eh.
My first start of a full week after a long time. I need to plan my leave. Apparently, I would need to take at least 2 days to make sure my leave doesn't get swallowed up.
Now that I am back at work, its back to listening to the nuances of inefficient colleagues, I want to be immerse in my world of riders, elves, drawves, dragons!                  

Its almost amazing how I manage to screw up my body clock the first day I go on leave. Feaking 2.33am and I am as awake as an owl.

I was perching and puking for 12 hours before, which meant I slept all the time, thus the alertness now. Its the Godiva milkshake, I tell u, they probably used stale milk. A 8 dollars a pop, it was so not worth drinking. I tossed and turned about in bed before trying to do something more useful, like do my malay homework.

Its frustating. I am starting to doubt my initial motives for learning the langugae. I wanted to be able to read all the malay signs and understand when the malay speaks. Not that I have any malay friends anyway. It just pisses me off that the Malaysian chinese can speak 3 languages and us, only 2. At the rate I am going, I will hardly be able to converse in Malay. I do my homework by checking the dictionary for almost every single word. It is not that I do not commit to memory the words, I do, I really do but the vocab is just so vast. Not to mention sentence construction. The Zhao Ju baffles me totally.

Sigh

Anyway I was thinking its about time I looked at my Dec 2005 post to see if I achieved anything this yr. So far its not bad. Thats mainly cos I made so general statements. I still feel a bit aimless about life, about if there is more to life then just contributing to a MNC where you are but one in the big picture. I guess most of 2006 was spent at work, going home, going out with Alboy and going to work.

Nevertheless, lets see

1) I want to excel at my new position. I have to. Its a brand new position and I am scared shitless but I really want to prove to everyone I can do it.
Well, I'm still working on it. I need time to prove this.

2) I have to be more absolute and procrasinate less. I have decided to pen a to-do-list.
Hahah, I had a to-do list. For like 3 months before I gave up. Thing is, I do not have much to do. I see it as a bad thing. Like I said, my now revolves around going to work, waiting for weekend and sleep.

3) To visit new cities. Toying with the idea of bringing my mum to korea, but that may conflict with my new job scope. See how. I want to go somewhere with Alboy too.
No Korea, we went hk instead. I figured it was cheaper even though we stayed at a very expensive hotel. Where did I go in 2006 - KL, Pg, BKK, Manila, LA, Vegas, Austin, HK. No new countries. New cities include LA, Vegas and Pg though. This is prob the yr I spent the most months travelling. Considering I went to the States for a month. Pg twice. Alboy was with me for 2 glorious week in Austin, LA and Vegas.

4) Meet up with my friends more.
Not too sure about this. Seems to be having lesser and lesser friends. Been going out with work colleagues a lot, which I still have not figured out if its a good or bad thing.

5) Save at least 10K. 15K would be nice although I think it will be pushing it.
Hahahaha.

6) Sleep less, wake up earlier.
Since my life revolved around going to work (notice I say going to work, not work), I wake up at 744 am for most part of the year. I still sleep through all weekends though.

7) Make my parents less pissed with me less often. This is going to be a tall order though.
Am not sure about this.

Things that happen in 2006
You know what I do not know. Last year, I could write things like I cut my hair the most times blar blar, frivulous as it may be. This yr, my mind draws a blank slate. I remembered wanting the year to go by very fast at the start of the year, that was mainly due to my unstable state cos of work issues and partly cos I was eager to get out of the training phase and go to US. Now that the year has indeed raced past me, I am at a lost.

Either that, or things just do not mean that much to me anymore.
Does baking muffins for the very first time in my life count? I took pictures, but I forgot how to post them on blogger. Too lazy to go meddle.

I browsed through my blog enteries for the year and this is what I concluded happened in 2006
- I spent the most time away from home in a foreign country.
- I actually spent a lot of time at work at the start of the year. My early postings were all " I left the office after 8", probably part of the reason why I wanted the year to whizz by.
- I seemed to be buying a lot of shoes.
- Alboy got me a lovely bday present this time. This was solely due to the fact that I finally managed to verbalised myself and told him what I wanted. I even got pass the uneasy feeling of choosing the design with him and making him pay for it. Something I would never do before.
- Probably the year I watched the least movies.
- A blog entry got featured on Digital Times. I forgot about it until I reread my entries. See, thats how significant things are to me these days.

What I want to do in 2007
I do not know yet.
- Start tennis lessons maybe?
- Do something on the side. Maybe just learning how the stock market works or some new programming language, or just something, some money making scheme.
Will post when I think of more.

Season Greetings

So, the torrential 3 day rain finally stopped. I was hoping it will still be raining when I woke up this morning. I think its kinda cool to have it rain all the time. I love the rain and I'm not even complaining that I forgot to bring my brolly out when I rushed out of the house yesterday and had to walk in the rain. I even ate ice cream while walking in the rain. I had this melon ice cream craving for weeks and I just had to eat one melon ice cream regardless of the weather.

Its very amazing how the mud is still so soft even after 12 hours of sunshine. Usually, the mud here is super hard, now my heels sink into the mud every step I take.

The pool was super cold today, I think its all rain water in the entire pool today. Its quite cool actually. Now that the sun is out, its so so so hot again. But, then again the rain doesn't cool things down much because the humidity is still so high.

Town was crazily packed yesterday even at 5pm. I went to La Senza and they had this lovely sale. I am so tempted to go back and get things in all different colours. I got some xmas presents already. I'm a bit shocked that my colleague gave me a 100 dollar Metro Voucher as xmas present and a separate birthday present. Considering I only bought a 30 dollar gift for her for xmas, now, I need to get something good for her birthday next year. Maybe I should even stop complaining about her going on and on about her wedding plans.

I need to enjoy my birthday tomorrow. Sleep in, and look ahead to the next week because I do not have to go to work. Yippee. December is always good.

A good read

After sending out the last post, I decided the solution to all that rambling is that I need a good book.
I am one issue behind my weekly reading of Times, but I so need a good book.
Any recommendations? I'm looking along the lines of books like Tipping point, Freakanomics  etc etc...

Yet another wedding.

I attended my cousin's wedding yesterday and again I have this mixed thing abt wedding dinners.

Before the wedding, my stand towards wedding was to make it as simple as possible since nobody will be remembering it.
After my cousin's wedding, I changed my take. Now, its either as posh as possible or as simple as possible.
I was amazed at how much I bitched to myself about my cousin's wedding. Considering it was held at a restaurant, it was a tad different from all the fancy hotels I've been going to. Do not misunderstand me, I am not saying that it is in anyway inferior. It was just different. The crowd was different, more rowdy and dialect speaking. It actually felt more knitted considering there are only half the usual amount of tables. The music and lightning were so ching chong, but the food was actually ok. Hotel food are such horrid.

But, the whole thing was just so strange. I think I been to too many posh weddings. None of my relatives made snide remarks which was kinda surprising. My mum was convinced that at 550 a table it was expensive. I was thinking to myself, omg, if all my uncles think this way too, I will make a huge loss when its my turn. I cannot really verbalize what I feel cos I do not really know. Its just very weird, all I know at the end of the day is that I do not ever want to hold mine in a restaurant. So high class eh. *chides myself*  Mainly because , I do not want cheesy ching chong music, 80s Mission Impossible kinda tuntuntun lightning, cheapo looking gowns and albums. Sigh.  Double Sigh again because this totally contradicts my "I don't care" stand.  

Since my take on it is so extreme - either as posh as possible or as simple as possible. I feel extremely irritated.

Anyway, my take on it is that I am still not interested in all these wedding stuff. The more I am exposed to it, the more irritated I get. Why can't society except two people eloping or having different partners at different stage of your life. Although I stayed with a guy for a long enough time, sometimes, in fact a lot of the time, I just want to be alone. I don't like a lot of things that come with a r/s but I guess its a give and take kinda thing.

Enough rambling, Its Friday, my weekend should be approaching fast. Can't wait to get to my bday and the last week of the year.

As time goes by....

Its one of those days where I wake up absolutely exhausted. I slept well during the weekend. I slept pretty decently last night but still I feel like crap. I conclude again that I am not a morning person. My shoulder no longer aches that much after that lady gave me a absolutely fantastic massage. I hope it lasts.

Recently I grown to detest certain people. Its hard to say why why what what but this is a public blog afterall. Once I put effort to password lock it then I will write more. But really, I do not understand why some people can turn out so different in the years, or why some people think that they are superior/inferior than what they really are. Someone recently had a issue at work where all the colleagues were quarrelling over the 'Best Friend' issue. I thought 'Best Friends' were beyond our time and only existed when you were in primary school. I told her that and that you will probably have different friends at different stages of your life. Unless your characters are a perfect match, two friends will probably at same point in time lag behind each other, which sucks.

Too much undercurrent at work makes me so tired too, or maybe its a combination of the cold air, pc screen and noisy colleagues.

Santa baby...

Santa baby, all I want for Christmas is
- new sony camera
- nice earrings
- new mattress
- non aching body.

Nah, actually Santa baby, all I want for Christmas is peace, quietness and a smile on my face.

Off

So, off to HK back in Sg for 7 hours (in the middle of the night)  before going off to Penang. I feel tired already.
Penang was so last minute. I don't even think I have enough clothes.
Boss is going too so its not going to be fun. Aiyah. Headache. Need to go home. Tataz.

 

Thus far..

Lets see, it has been quite fruitful.
I cut my hair. Finally.
Started Malay classes.
Went to a baby's 1mth old at the far side of the island.
Edited a video clip.
Arranged to play tennis on Friday.
Not bad.

I just need to find a regular tennis coaching kind of thingy.

On another note, my colleague has been going on and on about her wedding/house/photos I am getting so OD. It has been like this for almost a year. She started looking for a place a yr ago but has yet to find one. Then, her bf proposed, it was more like a forced one imho, so there starts the wedding hotels.bridal talk..yadar yadar. I wonder why these people are so obsessed abt getting married.

Sure, getting married is a joyous occasion but really, how many wedding have you attended that you really really want to go? My count so far is none, maybe 1/2.  So my point is, whats the point in making such a hoo haa about your wedding when no one really wants to attend/will remember it.

If I had a choice, i would not even want to have the dinner. Then because its not very likely that will happen, it will be a chop chop affair. No cheesy photos, no dance, no singing, no surprises. Just eat ,hand over your angbao and go! Alboy says I'm heartless, but I really don't care.

Meanwhile, its back to hearing all the wedding ramble day in day out till my colleague gets married. Yucks.

Yet another sigh post

Sigh. I do not know if its another pre-monday blues or what, but I am getting this general I do not know what to do with my life now again.

If this were qaurter life crisis, it better be over in the next mth, am finally turning 26.

 

I feel so restrainted. To say restrained is not the entired truth. Its more like I want to do a lot of things but I am not doing.

Even simple things. Like CUT MY BLOODDY HAIR!!!  Can you believe I procasinated for months. I am so disugsted with myself.

My usual slew of reasons:

- swam in the day, so I do not want to wash my hair many times a day.

- leave office too late, too lazy to take cab, no pt stlying my hair at night

- weekends - I just fall back in to slumber.

- its a money saving action to not cut my hair

 

And then, before you know its its six long months since my last hair cut.

 

 

I just found out my cousin is doing his MBA. He around my age and graduated a yr or two later. I used to be the academically brighter child, but now even he is doing a MBA. In a pathetic way, I feel so sorry for myself. I do not know if its procasination, but I have no idea if an MBA is useful for me. I still do not think its worth the money, but then again, imagine the price of no education. You can't really tag a monetary value to knowledge.

 

And, I cannot get my firewire port to work. Mega sigh

 

Good news is I am starting malay lessons twice a week.

 

I am looking for a tennis buddy, to play on weekday nights. Mon thurs out cos of malay classes.  Possible coaching lessons, rate is $50/hr for two. Anyone interested? Intricate details are not worked out yet.

.

Song of the day - "Baby baby hit me one more time"
Fwah- yes, I shall stop lamenting.

Knock me on my head.

I need to be knocked on the head.

Just on monday and tuesday, I was in this semi-conscious state, falling back into slumber every 10minutes or so. I slept like 16 hours a day I think. I told myself, this is not good, I need to go back to work. I even went on to think, thank goodness the next p.holiday is christmas.

Please bash me up today.

The horrid feeling of peeling myself out of the bed at 730am is just too much. I am so not a morning person. I blame the humid weather for making me think that way in the past two days. If the weather were cooler, I prob have no qualms lying in bed the whole day.

I finished book 11 of lemoney snicket and can't wait to know what happens in the end.  I am half tempted to buy the whole series. Its 160 a set. Its quite ok considering there are 13 books. What puts me off is that I know that if I wait, there is prob going to be a 20%, 30% discount some time soon. Also, I already have book 1,2,3, 11, albeit in a different cover. Plus, I know the fact is that my irritating siblings are prob going to rip the collect apart, that happened to CS Lewis and all the other collections I have. I would hesitate less if I have my own place, my own library.

I want to be the 4 in 10

Headlines in ST today were to make p.transport so good that 'My other car is public transport'

 

To that I say, "Xiao eh"

 

Our transport minister must have never taken p.transport on a regular basis. I hate people who make/says such comments.

 

Till today, except for the super rich people that say, oooh I don't need a car because the MRT is so convenient, everyone else wants a car!

 

IMHO, the public transport no matter how fantastic it becomes will never compare to having your own transport.

 

Imagine these scenarios,

 

Would you rather wake up 1 hr early every morning, stand on the train with smelly bodies squashed against you for one whole hour every single working day of your life,  or, sleep in and drive in heavy traffic to your workplace. If it rains, its ok because you park in an underground carpark. With p.transport, good luck to you.

 

Would you rather take the train, carry 1 litre of water everywhere or drive and leave the water in your car. I have to drink a lot of water so I get very frustrated when I have to carry my water around. Firstly, I need a big enough bag to dump my nalgene in, the 500ml one, plus water is really heavy. Oh say, you want to go for a swim/tennis/some random sports before meeting your friends, would you want to lug all your gear around in p.transport.  Fwah, hell no.

 

The shuttle bus from the mrt takes 30mins(not inclusive of waiting time)  to reach my house. A car trip takes 5mins. Would you still want to take p.transport?

 

After you are dead tired from a long day, do you still want to stand 1 hr on p.transport. 1hr is the average time it takes to get to anywhere from my place. You stand on the train/bus, jerking forward backward as the train moves, your bag becomes increasingly heavier.

 

Yup, driving can get maddening when the road jams up. You hear drivers complain abt the horrid jams every morning. These people have driven too much too long that they forgot what it is like to take p.transport. Next time you hear someone complain, just ask them. would you want to take p.transport instead. What makes you think buses do not crawl in the traffic too. The yellow lane thingy makes only a slight difference, that is if you can squeeze your way up the bus first. So many times buses have zoom past me because they were overloaded.

 

Sigh, these ministers. They probably did so well in life they forgot what it is like to take p.transport. Its ridiculous really.

Whatever, keep doing your job and hopefully when I finally own my set of wheels, the road will be totally free for me. The other 6 in 10 people can go take the train to work.

Where have all the dogs gone??

Its was really strange.

I been walking around in orchard and I always notice people decked in the latest designer wear, carrying handbags that cost 1k a pop, perfectly manicured nails and oh-so-diva hair. There seems to be so many of these people all around. Majority of them are young, probably plus minus my age. I always wonder how these people manage it all. Its either they were born rich, willing to spend, doing very well in their careers, or just people like me maybe except that they are more willing to spend.

 

Today, I came to the conclusion that they probably were all born rich. Its really crazy. I took the train from expo all the way back west, on the whole journey I did not even see a single designer wear on the train. ziltch. Totally Ziltch. Do all these people drive? or take cabs? Maybe my timing was a bit early for fancy people to arrive but still, totally none. What I see on the train is familes wearing sandals you buy from the heartland, pvc worn out bags, tired faces.

 

On a side note, I bought or rather Alboy bought the game Articulate. Now, lets gather a few people and play!

Barks Howls Bites

I am so blooooooody pisssed.
I hate people who rummage through my stuff. I hate people who don't give me the privacy I need. I hate people who happily draw conclusions based on whatever they conjure from rummaging through my stuff. I hate people who talks too loudly. I hate people who don't listen. I hate people who thinks they are super ill treated when they are not. I hate people that compare apples to oranges. I hate people who work as if they have monument tasks when I see minimal output. I hate people who make negative comments on stuff they have no part in. I hate people who behave overly flustered because it irritates me the whole day to see them 'dash' in and out with a pursed look on their face. I hate having to smile and say hi to people. I hate people assuming as if having to care for everyone is my responsibility. I hate people making a mountain out of fa molehill when in actual fact it does not make any difference. I hate that I am feeling this week is getting too long. I hate people saying that swimming is fun. It is not, its my kind of activity and I swim cos I really enjoy it not cos its fun. You cannot say its fun when you do not even know how to peddle in water. I am in such a bad mood today. Fuck Fuck Fuck

 

It must be the hormones

I'm in a really foul mood. I have no idea why too, in fact I shouldn't be but I can't help feeling totally foul.

I just took a $25 cab ride. Thats what happened at the end. So, it happened like this. Alboy was totally exhausted and took a 'nap' after agreeing to sending me back home after that. He was impossible to joslt awake, so I offered to take a cab home myself. I really don't mind because I do not do it very often and I know that he is really very tired.

He told me to call a cab but I refuse, I always do because I feel it is pointless because there are always so many cabs just a short 3-4 min walk away. I'm a bit anal at having to pay extra for cabs that are already so expensive. I left and walked myself out. It wasn't a very well lighted road but I was fine. However somehow my mood was starting to get crappy. Its a girl thing, you say no but if no really happens, reality bites and its painful. The difference is, I know I said no so I had no right to complain.

On an ordinary night, it would have been the end of the story and I would hop onto the cab on my way home. Not tonight though.

After walking for a minute, I realised that having spent almost 40 bucks on cab the previous day, I might not have enough money for midnight charge. I checked my wallet and I only had $15 left. I definately do not have enough money. It usually cost about $14 without the midnight charge.

What to do? I called Alboy and told him I had no money and wanted to loan from him. I was even ready to walk back, he didn't even have to walk out. Somehow I think he heard me wrongly and replied in a most irriated tone, "I already told you to call a cab".

That totally tripped me. We have never agreed on the calling of cab issue. He always call a cab and thinks I should. To me, its just a waste of money. I bet he thinks I am trying to be misery, something along that line.

I retorted, told him nevermind and hung up. He tried calling twice but I hung him up. I switched my phone off after that. Somehow, irrational as it may sound, something inside me just flipped.

I took a deep breath as I analysed my dire situation. Alone, dark, no money and now too proud to ask for help. I walked and walked and rembering that now all Esso stations have ATM in them, I walked towards an Esso. I thought I was saved.

BUT, as if to mock me, the atm was 'temporaily out of service' when I reached Esso. If the aem were human, I would have given it two tight slaps. Whats the point of an atm if it does not spit money out. Fwah.

I went back onto the road and started walking, before I decide that I should just flag a cab and hop in. Suddenly, it dawned onto me that I could pay by credit card. So, I flagged a cab, make sure with the driver I could pay by card and hop on in. Afterall, I heard so many horror stories of how cab drivers refuse to accept card. The uncle was unbeliavblly animated and he did lighten my mood a little. He was telling me about his drunk customers and how you need a degree in botany before the government gives you a permit to grow vegetables these days.

I went home, switched on my phone and saw 10 missed calls. My phone has been quiet since. I guess Alboy must be sound asleep now and I am unsure what to feel about it.

Since, I have no one to complain to considering I hardly have any friends, its all out here, which actually sucks because I feel I do not have to let the entire www know. Then again, I typed so much, it seems like a waste to just delete it all.

Good Tuesday to all

Its a strange phenomenon really. At 11-12midnight on Sunday, one by one my friends log off and say they need to sleep. After donkey years of working, I still cannot get used to it. Hey, these people used to chat with me till 3/4am. Nowadays I find myself totally tired by midnight too, no amount of lingzhi pills seems to be helping. I try to calculate to see if the number of awake hours are the same, but somehow I cannot seem to get the maths right. The level of physical activity during the day has definitely dropped too considered I used to have to walk to the bus stop, up and down slopes, walk everywhere. These days, my lunch time swim do not really count. I sit on my butt the whole day and mostly take a cab home.

I go to the office and I hear office aunty talk. Its like you want to shut the crap up of those people who talk, but yet want to listen intently cos the stuff they talk about is pretty out of the world. I just learnt that one of them irons her bedsheet. Who in the right mind does that? Firstly, I would want my bedsheets to be cool, ironing just gives this trapped warm air feeling. Plus, don't you toss and turn at night. Ahhh, I know why,  old hags don't make out or have toy boys to mess up the beds. Later, someone was mentioning that someone's husband made someone starched the bedsheets too. Crazy. And then the boss walks in and silence falls as they all pretend to work.

Good Tuesday to me.

So much angst

Welcome dear body to another day where everything feels like stone.
I figured I probably need to sleep at 10pm everyday to feel like a million dollars the next day, else no matter what time I sleep, I probably feel like crap unless I wake up at noon.

Anyway I have been feeling super irritated these days. I hate working with incompetent people. I hate it that people complain about their work all the time and whole day say they want to go on holiday. I want to go on holiday tooo, but I do my fair share of work. These people want to quit but are hanging on cos there is a possible chance of a trip to somewhere in the coming months, then they quit right after.

Dang has been really busy of late so its also getting irritating that he is mostly dead tired. I think I am just short fuse these days. Maybe its the mooncakes, I only like Raffles hotel cognac mini snowskin mooncake,  but people keep sending substandard mooncakes to the office and my colleagues keep forcing me to eat them. With the exception of Raffles hotel mooncakes, I hate all other mooncakes. Why force me to eat them. I want my gelatos not mooncakes. We should have a Gelato festival or something instead.

Of day and night.

So, I stopped playing lemmings and by right should be wide awake today since I slept  7 hours yesterday. But but but, my head is still fuzzy.
Today my colleague came back from her holiday and started polluting my mind about how the grass is greener on the other side. Seriously, I am so sick of such things. I know my pay is not necessary the highest but hearing about such things just make you distracted and sad. I do not need such crap. Work is one thing but there are other aspects of my life I want to be happy with. I need to start finding myself a passion. Swimming hardly qualifies cos you can only swim once a day.

I had the strangest dream last night. This guy (I have no idea who), but it seems like I was in a relationship with him. So, this guy had a ring and it seemed like he was trying to propose to me, so he came really close to me and I deliberately drop the ring on the floor. The ring was like rolling around and people around me were gushing because a diamond is hard to find on the floor. I was shocked too cos I didn't want to be responsible for the lost of the ring. Eventually someone found it and  gave it to him. Then as he came closer to me, I took the ring and place it back in his hand, telling him it was just not meant to be. I could feel sadness as I did so. Then, I ran off and my good girlfriends followed. Again, I  had no idea who these girls are, they didn't even resemble anyone I know in real life. They were like shocked but erupted into merry making to cheer me up and we decided to tour the world. I think my dream stopped there or I woke up.

It was really strange.

Things that I hate

I hate it when I procrasinate because I get very pissed with myself and I don't like it. I hate it that I keep thinking of the long overdue task when I should be enjoying myself.

I hate it when everyone around me is so busy you have to arrange for outings months ahead. I hate it when everyone does not keep time. A dinner date should start on time. Rubber time is no good.

 

I hate it that people only come to you when they need help. I hate it when poeple take you for granted. I hate it that people have to multitask and schedule so many things at the same time. I hate it when I trudge through Mondays to Fridays. I hate it worse when I realised midweek that the week is going too slowly. I hate it that you have to play tennis with two people. Why can't every tennis court have a practising wall.

 

I hate it that weekends are so short.

Monday Monday....

Only monday morning and it has been a slurry of activities. Already mentally strangled some of my colleagues many times over.
Its too exhausting to describe the events but I cannot believe how dense some people can get.

My stomach is all knotted up again and the new toilet at the new office is not very conducive for shitting. Firstly there is this stupid motion sensor that is supposed to keep the light on. Problem is that it goes off every 10 sec. So, you either wave ur hands frantically every 10s, or shit in the dark. If you are in the cubicle further away, there is no way you can activate the motion sensor.

Thank goodness its almost noon and I am going to swim. I am a little against the hot sunthough. I hope its shady.

 

Back!

Back Back Back! In Fact back for a week.

LA was a mess, minus Disney the happiest place on earth. Even Disney, I felt Tokyo’s Disney was much better. The staff were more polite and I felt happier.

Vegas was good. Won Money at the penny machines and Grand Canyon was just humbling. The 5 hr drive to and fro was killing though. I never driven so much so fast in my life.

 

Back to the routine of work. We have a new office now. I am still undecided on how I feel about my new seat. Right in front of me is this huge red pillar that blocks my entire view. To my left is this big hole that leads to the pantry. I try to position myself so that I am in between these two structures and can see some view. My colleague next to me types too loud and it is irritating me. My boss is very near me now and my stingy office manager is of hearing distance too. I suspect they can hear my phone conversations. Have to be extra careful now.

 

Although I just got back, I would not mind traveling again. Not too sure if I can take leave. I have like 30 days of leave. There are so many places I want to go.

Yeah only 2 more nights in Austin!l

then, I am off to LA and Vegas. I hope the trip would be fun. I mean, afterall I am so sick of the US of A. I wonder why anyone will come here long term.
Yesterday I met up with my project mentor again, and I felt like bashing him. After the longest time of getting the fact that sg is not part of China into thick skull. He exclaimed,  "How come this is in English?" when I showed him newspaper cutting of The Strait Times.  I wanted to knock his head. Helllo, please do your research. I later sent him the Wikipedia entry of Sg for him to read, if he reads. I wanted to tell him that we probably have a much higher literacy rate than his country, and that we cane americans who come and vandalise our property. Such a kok.

I do not like classical music.

So, I been going out with the Korean guy because I rather he drive. It is so pathetic. He plays the oboe and he actually brought his classic CDs here and he has been playing them in the car all the time. Its getting on my nerves. Then, I have no idea why he is so uptightek can about time. Its like I tell him meet at 11am, he has to call me at 1045am to ask me again. So duh. Then whenever we go out, he just wants to return to the hotel asap. I have half the mind to abandon him. He behaves like this other hongkong guy I know. Kinda glad to start work tomorrow so that the week can pass faster. 1 month here is too long.

Big things.

Yes, I am still here. There is nothing much to do except what terror warnings repeatedly on TV. I hope things are not as bad when I go back. I do not want to miss my flight. I went to the grocery store yesterday, the chips I wanted were on the top shelf, and you know what... I couldn't reach the shelve at all. I jumped and jumped but still couldn't reach it. Thats how c giangantic things are.

My laptop is cranky too. Its hard to type. The cursor jumps back 4 words every 5 words. So, I keep having to retype. Then, I cannot move the laptop. I cannot on it after I transport the laptop. So duh.

I wonder if I am homesick yet..

So, I am out of the country and I get sms saying that my blog was quoted on Digital Times. Ahha.  I didn't even get to see the article!

Obviously, I went to check my google analytics to see if there is any spike in traffice. So, I got about 65% new readers, thankfully  u readership isn't too high. Else, i have to be start being careful about what I write, because if you know me, you will know its me.

 

Yup, I am in US now, the land where everything is super big but nowhere as nice as Singapore. I love my country man. I hear there is late night shopping now and tons of fireworks going on. There is absoutley nothing to do here. Driving on the other side of the road is a tad scary,  and I hate it that the signs are so tiny, or blocked by some big trees and that everything is on the right.

 

K, the internet sucks here, so thats it and I'll be back in a month!

Gone 3D2N

I am going to our neighboring country for boot camp *crys*
Actually for my company's team building, but after I took a look at the photos I think its more like boot camp.
Doing orientation games that are sooooo outdated, leaving in so-called chalets that are in the middle of the jungle. Grass, Mud, Insects everywhere. You get the picture. The kinda days where your underwear is never dry cos you constantly get thrown into the murky yellow brown river water.  Yucks.
WhywhydoIstillhavetodoallthesewhenIhaveoutgrownthisstage???? *wails*

 

I am Singaporean

Inspired by Mr Brown

My name is Handsel and it doesn't mean anything.

I live in Singapore and studied here all my life.
I followed through the competitive, merciless education system, emerging a graduate with little sense of the future.
I take the MRT everywhere, now I can repeat the terrorist warning messages in English, Mandarin, Malay and even Tamil (at least the numbers 999).
I love the national flag, and can recite the pledge in both English and Mandarin.
I sing Majulah Singapura proudly, although I do not understand what the malay words mean.
I read every sign in all three languages and stare hard at the Tamil words, hoping one day I will recognise the word 'Fine'.

I love my country and hate being mistaken for nationalities that I am not.
I silently sing Kit Chan's "Home" and queue proudly at the "Singaporean-Welcome Home" lane when I am back at the best airport in the world.
I am afraid to say my real name incase I kena the sedition act and I am a Singaporean.
So say we all

Of cars, buses and helis....

Yawn Yawn Yawn. Yet again, I am falling asleep.

I have been so bothered by details of planning for LA and LV that I'm frustrating myself.
And to think I was never a 'need to know all the details' person. I think some people I know will hyperventilate over this. *winks*

Having said that, I think it is still important to know my itinerary in general and how I am supposed to get from place to place.
Things like whether driving makes more sense, or getting a bus, or taking an expensive helicopter ride. If moolah were aplenty, things would be easier. However, I feel it will be stupid if unnecessary money is spent when it could have been saved with a little more research.

Now, the plan is to tentatively drive from LA to LV, then drive the next day to Grand Canyon. Easy enough right.

Here comes the part that complicates the whole thing,  my flight back home is from LA at noon. So, I have to make that 6 hours drive, more if I get lost, back.  Plus time to check in, this means I have to start driving at a ridiculous 3am in the morning. This makes paying for an extra hotel night so dumb. Oh, did I mention that I so wisely booked my hotels already?

Either I drive at 3am, or take the 1am bus, which makes more sense because its safer and less tiring.  Then, the money factor comes in because it is cheaper to get a round ticket trip instead of a single ticket. See how this totally negates my initial plan of driving.

Confusing right.

and, I yet to check out the car rental rates, bus schedules, helicopter trips......

 

Time..

Sometimes I think time isn't enough.
I left the office at 8pm last night. It was not too late though. In fact, I deliberately waited for 8pm to leave. I had finished my swim at 720 and figuring it makes no sense to go back at that time, I went back to the office to read the newspapers.
So, I reached home at 8.15pm. Dinner and it was like 9pm when I was done. Watched a bit of the shows my brother recorded for me and it was 10pm.
10pm was desperate housewife time. Mull over my claims , surf for hotels, at 11pm and it was like time for bed.
Crazy, I felt like I had no time to myself. You may disagree, but I hate it when I am too tired to even read.  I didn't need to bath because I did that before going home.

So, I resolved to leave office at like 7pm latest today.

But, my mum's incessant nagging when she sent me to work today made me change my mind. If I could freely surf and do my general administrative stuff in the office. I will finish it all and go home only for dinner. My mum is downright ridiculous. She happily spins stories and starts believing in it and accusing the whole world. Sometimes I wonder why I keep pushing off plans for the next overseas trip with her. I am not sure if I can take it.

Now I understand why I hardly miss home when I am travelling. And, lets see what time I will leave the office today.

 

From LA to LV...

Am planning to go LA then LV.
Anyone has any tips for me. Which hotel is good?
I have been surfing and I am looking at Ramada Inn Hollywood in LA and Harrah Hotel and Casino LV.

Looking at not too pricey hotels, but I do not mind paying a bit more if the location is good. No point paying for a really cheap hotel and then paying through the throat for transporation.

And, how do I get from LA to LV? Someone told me drive. I googled and saw that there are bus trips but the timings will prob not make it in time for my flight. My flight is at LA airport.

Advice Advice anyone?

Finally back.

I am finally back after 1 week in Penang and 1 week in KL.
I had enough of Msia, nothing beats being back in your own country.
The trees look greener, the ground cleaner and the sun brighter.

Am so tired. Even after sleeping for 12 hours. I love my country.

Lunch is exciting.

Lunch was an eyeopening affair today.
One of my Thai colleague was telling us about his gf, and then revealing that he/she is transsexual. We were like gaping in astonishment when he went on to graphically describe their sex life. He claims that the girl/guy can have orgasms I was like huh, really ah. If he had been a better looking guy, I might have been so grossed out but he is like pimply, in short ugly.

Then, another colleague received a present from our Thai colleague, It was a dildo/vibrator. Seriously, I have no idea whats the difference although she claimed there is. Woa, it was like rubbery, kinda thick and big in my opinion, it was like weird feeling it. I cannot imagine stuffing something like that into myself just to climax.

I am not particularly conservative but I am still reeling from the whole experience. *shugs*

 

In reality,

730am: I woke up and stared at my phone. Turns over to look at Alboy and he is deep in sleep
731am: Fell back to sleep
800am: I woke up again. Turns over to look at Alboy and he is deep in sleep
801am: Fell back to sleep
830am: I woke up again. Turns over to look at Alboy and he is deep in sleep
831am: Fell back to sleep
845 am: He finally stirs and went to wash up.
846am: Since I could not do anything, I fell back to sleep again.
915am: I woke up and washed up
930am: Left the house
1015am: Arrived at Redstart
1115am: Paid the bill. It was pouring heavily so Alboy immediately fell back into slumber in the backseat of the car.
1145am: We drove off.
1215pm: Both of us fell asleep in the car at his workplace carpark
1pm: Alboy woke up to start work and I continued sleeping

Amazing eh, I am so amazed at myself at how I/we sleep.

 

The plan

730am : Alboy wakes up and starts washing up
800am: I wake up
845am: Reach Red Star
1000am: Finish Breakfast

Isn't it great to have everything done by 10am.
Then, we can laze around, town, catch a movie. nap. Nice.

However, what most likely will happen
730am : Sleeping
800am : Sleeping
845am : Still Sleeping
1000am: Still Sleeping
1200pm: Waking up
1230pm: Wake up and start to wash up
1pm: Alboy is still washing up
1.30pm: Alboy dresses
2pm: Leave for Redstar
3pm: Reach Redstar for breakfast just as it is packing up

Well, I'm not exaggerating Such things has happened before because Alboy and me are such deep sleepers. We belong to the rare breed who can sleep for 16 hours straight even after sleeping a full 24 hours prior to that.

Lets see, and I will update on Monday how things go.

 

Smile and show your teeth!

So, my nose has been leaking non stop for 2 days now. My lungs feel so clogged up. Its crazy and I haven't swam for 3 days. I bet I just lost all my stamina. It happens when I go under the weather. I need to weight myself. I wonder if I lost weight.

Recently I  been told that I grind my teeth at night when I sleep. Alboy told me it was this hideous loud grinding noise. Of course, I dismissed him. One week later, my dentist asked me the same question. Apparently there are some tell tale marks on the inner side of my cheeks. Damnit. Now, I either risked my teeth eroding or I have to wear a guard to sleep. Like a muzzled dog. My dentist told me to monitor the problem - I wonder how, I wouldn't know if I grind my teeth in my sleep eh.

I  been exceptionally conscious of it since then. I loosen my jaws before I sleep. However the thing is, my jaws feel extremely tight when I wake up and I am pretty sure I grinded them in my sleep. Alboy says the trick is to stuff a carrot into my mouth at night.

As if that is not enough, I have recessed gums too. That leads to my dentine being exposed and thus the most painful sensation everytime I been eating sweet food. For the longest time, I thought I  had a cavity and all my dentist tell me otherwise. So, now its because my gums are recessed. Sounding like an old woman eh. I now have to use a soft toothbrush and a sensitized toothpaste. I been using a whitening toothpaste which I shouldn't because it will cause the gums to recess even faster. Crap, how to have white shinning teeth like that??

Give me a break. I'm not that old to have all these teeth woes.

 

Alas, the guilt of work

I was expecting myself to type. It feels great, but instead I think I will do a - It feels strange.

Yes, my weak self gave in and I took MC today. It wasn't all that unjustifable. I had been having this nagging pain in my throat for about a week. Yesterday, I felt slightly feverish as if I might fall sick. That however did not happen and I broke out of it before I went to bed last night. This morning, I simply lost all motivation to work. In fact, I debated about it for a precious 20 mins at 7am this morning, ultimately convincing myself that it was no harm. Afterall, I had not taken a single day of leave or mc since the start of the year.

This time I did not have to wait 1 hr for my mc, since I had fully grasp the routiness of the doctor's schedule. I went right before he closed for lunch and waited only 15mins. The doc was a bit of a strange thing. He actually gave me an MC for tomorrow instead of today, and argued with the nurse when I pointed it out.

I dutifully spent the whole day sleeping after finishing the last chapter of "The rule of four". Not a recommended read. Perhaps its because the book is authored by 2, that makes the flow somewhat strange. It never fails to amaze me how much I can sleep. I ate dinner on a full stomach and feel werid.

Perhaps, I should have just taken mon and tue off and scotted off to hk with missy y. Alas, the guilt of work.

Am planning to take next friday off, however, I have a feeling I might be on standby for an event and that my leave will not materialise.

GSS is starting, when does Club 21 start it sales? I saw some oh so pretty but pricey stuff, the stuff that is only worth buying during a sale.

Cinderella outfit

Today I wore a skirt to work and its amazing how many comments about it I got.
They think I look pretty in a skirt , which baffles me because essentially I am the same person. I didn't apply any make up or style my hair. My tiny eyes were half closed, I still feel like a slump when I entered the office. There must be something about the skirt, or maybe that its the first time I wore a skirt on a normal work day since I started work.

More on my outfit, I have named it the 'Cinderella outfit'. Its knee length wrap flare skirt - green with purple trimmings paired with a whitish beige singlet. Seemingly apt eh. If you cannot picture it, go watch Waltz Disney Cinderella. Its what she wears when she does her household chores.

Am going to watch DVC code later. Yippee

 

Music feeds the soul

I was never a music bluff. Most of the time I listen to songs without knowing the lyrics or the singers. An mp3 player has no use to me. In fact, I only have 1 mp3 (my ringtone) in my sony walkman phone. A waste really.

Today I made myself a 7 thousand dollar radio. Yes, using equipment meant for more advanced applications, I made myself a radio. It was fairly simple considering all you needed was to capture the correct radio frequency signal and strip it down.

I love the sound of music at my work place. At my old seat, my malay colleague keeps the radio on all the time. Subconscioulsy, I was kept fairly updated with the latest release. Eversince I moved into the quiet serious corner, I didn't dare bring my own radio in the fear of breaking that intense silence. I started to lose touch with songs - which was good only in one way because Beyonce "Check on it" was just so painful to the ears. I call it the niam keng song. It just rants and rants. Now that I hear it less often, its actually not too bad.

Today I had an excuse to build the radio because it was needed for some demostration purpose. Also, half the people ard were not in. The other half were newbies who I know I can override. The sound of music. Fatabulous.

Tomorrow, I will try pushing the line to see if I can keep it on during the day.

The DVC Race

Yes, I raced.

In an oversized T-shirt too. Two L shirts were stuffed into the race pack that I got and I was too lazy to change it into a smaller size. I knotted the shirt at the waist but it just keep coming apart as I ran, thus slowing me down a lot.

It was fun. Alboy was so hyped up about winning that I was amused. He ran from station to station. I never seen him run so fast before. In fact, I wasn't even sure he could run because he has one prone to injury knee. He was really fast. Most of the puzzles were solved by him.

He solved them even before I could take a proper look at them. So much so for being short. I could hardly peer over other's shoulder. So, I decided to take on a different approach. While Alboy looks at the puzzle, I will go towards the race marshal and blatantly look at the answers others have, rush back to tell Alboy. I guess I am better at cheating.

It was a mad rush from station to station. I lead on the trains as Alboy almost never takes the train. Yet, I still was baffled as to which was the only yellow mrt station around. I asked all my friends and everyone told me commonwealth. I thought so too. It turned out to be Toa Payoh. Well, it figures, all of us live in the West and hardly go further than Orchard.

Anyway, it was great fun. The downside - My legs actually ache today from all that running. and to think I swim almost everyday and just paid 400 bucks to renew my pool membership. Crap.

Symbols

I read this somewhere:

$ is just a symbol but I need it. Damn it!

In response, the next one read:
I luv symbols.