I had the scariest dream.

I dreamt that my boss found my blog. He did a search for the word 'resume' and my blog turned up because I typed the word resume so many times on it.

I was walking around in the office and I saw him looking at a screen with pink layout which looked very much like mine. I peered nearer and I freaked out. I remember telling him or rather begging him not to read it because its my personal space. Although I leave very scanty personal information here, if you know me, you obviously can tell whose blog you are reading.

I think I almost cried in my dreams. I mean, how can you let your boss read your blog or worse let him find out your enthusiasm at work is all but a front and that you are trying desperately to change jobs. My boss is a great man, I respect him a lot and I know he values me at work.

How do you actually put it across that you want more? He isn't Singaporean and does not behave like the typical Singaporean boss. He has given me lots of opportunities and he loves the company. Sometimes, I feel like I am betraying him but everyone else has been telling me that I should think for myself instead of staying for the sake of loyalty. Two years at a slightly above entry level position doesn't really consitute much loyalty and I agree.

Sigh. The first thing I did when I woke up was to want to delete this blog. The dream was so real. I had to take deep breaths to calm myself down.

I muttered, its only a dream, only a dream.

If I ever shut this down abruptly, you know why.