Handsel on leave tomorrow!

Yeah!!! I’m on leave tomorrow!!!! *dance wildly across the room*

For the record, I have only taken two days of leave so far. The first was when I had to go for my convocation and the second was to go star gazing.

My itinerary tomorrow? Bum around and go swimming. Handsel is intoxicated with happiness. *breaks into yet another wild dance*

Plus, I will be going to KL and BKK soon.

Accommodation in BKK is really cheap. It is like 900BHT/night. Its 32BHT to 1 USD. Do the math yourself. I will be housed in Siam Beverly Hotel. Sounds like Beverly Hills accommodation? I WISH!!!

The website advertises this:
· Individually Controlled Air conditioning
· Private Bathroom with hot and cold water and both bathtub and shower
· Television with in-room movies
· International Direct Dial Telephone
· Mini bar
· Refrigerator

Woa..sounds like any other hotel eh. That’s what I’m worried about. The marketing industry is unscrupulous, be forewarned. If I were a guy, the apt description would be "scared till my balls shrunk" , and thankfully, I have no balls.

I cannot imagine what it feels like having your scrotum hang out of your body. I can picture guys telling me "nah, its part of the body", but come on, be truthful, most guys treat their dick as an external object, lavishing it with tenderness and not to mention, constantly stroking it. Some penises I know even have names. *wink*

Anywhow, I have decided that I will be upbeat about my coming trip. This is despite of the fact that I may have to drive up to KL and take a budget airline to BKK. *crossly my fingers tightly that I get a decent flight up to BKK*

Cheese Fondue and Aphrodisiac Cake

I had cheese fondue over the weekend at Swiss culture. It was different but nothing fantastic. A pot of overpriced melted raclette and some other cheese, the pungent aroma of good cheese was sorely lacking.



looks yucky right.

The waiter was a dumbass. He looked a bit like Bernard Lim but was trying to hard to act smart. There was a condescending look on his face when he took orders. It was the "oooh, yet another bunch of destitute fools."

I ordered a cheese and mushroom pasta in additional to the cheese fondue. He looked at me and gave this incredulous face. "Its cheese again", he said in a mildly irritated tone.
Obviously I realized. What, am I blind??? I can eat up all the cheese hills in the world if I want to. I glared at him and gave a resounding yes. He proceeded to scribble it on his miserable order form, I’m dead sure he must have dismissed me as yet another dumbass bimbo. Hey Waiter, read the papers, the school I went it is like officially top in sg now. Sidetrack, I have never seen so many medal of honors and a full page report dedicated to RV in the papers before.

When the cheese fondue was served, waiter went "All you have to do is to dip the bread in the cheese and eat, Very simple". I retorted when he went away " yayayya, else what, shaft the bread up your ass is it".

I hate dumb people.

I had a more pleasant dinning experience on Sunday.

I have to applaud big O for both its creativeness and chessy-ness.
Dang ordered a Rueben Sandwich, and it came in the shape of a heart. Muahaaaa.
Those who know that big O has been appointed as one of the official speed dating place will not be surprised. I was utterly tickled. Imagining eating a heart. Worse still, imagine a nervous guy asks a girl out for the first time, and he gets a heart for dinner. The guy might just pee in his pants out of sheer embarrassment.

That was not it.
There was an aphrodisiac cake – the official "Romancing Singapore" cake.
Surprise, it was in the shape of a heart. It was a very very yummy chocolate truffle cake.

And the best part of it all, big O forgot to charge me for the cake and the ice-cream.
Free Dessert. Now, how much more wonderful can life be!

Sex and the Handsel

I had many things on my mind. I wanted to blog about how the trees in the carpark were pruned yet once again, how things had a way of coming back to haunt you , how much I despise people dumber than me yadar yadar. However, I asked Pally what I should blog about tonight and he replied SEX. Sex and the Handsel.

We then proceeded to a short but rather intriguing (at least to me) session about sex. The contents of which I have sworn to secrecy.

I feel sex especially in my part of the world has been demonize as a disgusting and sinful act. We were taught to fear our sexual desires as the hand of the devil. Remember the scornful look on your relatives faces when there is a shotgun marriage. No one here talks about sex openly, if you do, you probably sworn your confidant to secrecy, the way I have been asked to many times. I look around at my friends and I assume they are all virgins, but assumptions remain assumptions. The initial shock when I learned the truth has become yet another jaded fact over the years.

Afterall, Durex is celebrating its 75 years of safe sex. A survey recently conducted by them revealed that people have sex an average of 127 times a year and that almost three quarters of us are happy with our sex lives. It’s the Eastern Europeans who are the most sexually active with the Hungarians, Bulgarians and Russians all topping the 150 mark each year. And while the Americans are well below the global average when it comes to frequency of sex, they’re still seen as one of the world’s sexiest nationalities – second only to the Brazilians Forty five per cent of people have had a real life one night stand, although virtual reality sex by phone, text or e-mail is clearly a growing phenomenon. However, this new techno trend is still no substitute for the classic turn on of sexy underwear, lubricants and sex toys.

A little known fact. Durex’s slogan is "For a hundred million reasons". How apt.
What so bad and fearful about sex? I do not know. Perhaps this is why SATC shone at the Emmys.

Marriage is the union of two people. Historically, intercourse was the act through which the male and the female experienced God. The ancients believed that the male of spiritually incomplete until he had carnal knowledge of the female. Afterall, it was only by commuting with a woman that a man could achieve a climactic instant when his mind went totally blank. All this had nothing to do with eroticism. Nirvana was described as a never-ending spiritual orgasm.

I think sex is good. One day, I want to be able to have great sex and be able to proudly tell all my friends, with full knowledge that this will not make them look at me in a different light.

* Certain ideas in this entry came from Dan Brown.

Someone closed to me once remarked that I am an unhappy person deep within. I shrugged it off and continued smiling. I punctuated my text msgs with many exclamation marks and greeted everyone with a very enthusiastic 'hi'. However, the fact was that his remark resonated in me for days.

I was not prepared to put this down in black and white, but what’s the point of having a blog when you are fearful to show your feelings.

Today, a whole series of unhappy events unfolded. They came crashing like a how cards stacked in a pyramid would. To elaborate the events would be too painful and it would only make me cry, already I have small eyes.

The aftermath of it was that I admit that I am a very unhappy person within. My closer friends will silently nod their head. Others will want to read on.

I am the by-product of strict disciplinary style parenting and the excellent sg educational system. My parents are disciplinants, never wrong and always act in the best interest they think would be for me. I grew up to be a very guai girl. However, as I grew older, I felt increasingly stiffen by their grip of control over me. I wanted to roam free but could not. Because deep down inside I am darn afraid of my parents (I still am), I started to rebel in the most ridiculous way. I was never brave enough to speak with my parents. It did not help that I become verbally constipated when I face my dad. Part of me thought it would be futile to do anything constructive about this, the other part of me was resigned. This had devastating effects on our relationship.

Do not mistake me. I love my parents dearly. They have done a lot of me and I would not be where I am today.

The educational system that I was subjected to also left me with little space to breathe. I HAD to excel while growing up. I went to top schools, took the most difficult subjects. Society is judgmental and we were regimentally judged by papers. I enjoy learning new things but gradually, having to learn because of an exam was tiring. When I reached tertiary education, having to learn complicated formulas became grueling. I felt I had no choice because I had to stay on the right side of the educational system. Afterall, I had struggled for so long and had come so far.
Increasingly, I gasp for air.

I want to do what I want to do, instead of what I have to do. You say, why not – just follow your heart. I tell you, it is not easy, I dare not. Blame it on a combination of the person I am and the experiences I had so far. I simply do not dare. Silly, isn't it? Considering that I have no inkling what I am afraid of.

Perhaps one day I will get it all figured out, and hopefully it will not be too late then.

p/s: If you are going to leave a comment about this entry, please do not preach. I will hate you.

Harold and Kumar go to White Castle

Monday. Pudgy Monday.

Instead of complaining of how the work week is going to suck, I will focus on all things good.

My weekend was mediocre. I watched Harold and Kumar go to White Castle. Heard of it?

Harold and Kumar go to White Castle. Lets put it this way, it is a american pie wannabe. The dialogue is crude, witty and lame - the whole thing is like mash pototes.

In the show, there are 2 leads, and yeah, you guessed it Harold and Kumar. Kuuumaar with 3 u's and 2 a's in it. Kuuumar, as how the americans will accentute it.

Now you ask, so whats the plot? yeah, you got it right - going to white castle. *rolls eyes*
That basically sums up the entire show. Harold and Kumar go to white castle. Easy enough.

To the ignorant, white castle is like ke ai ji here, except that they sell mide size burgers, supposedly so savorous and tantalizing that H & K had to have it. Mind you, white castle is a real fast food chain in the US. www.whitecastle.com

So, H & K travel to whitecastle. K is a sterotyped indian, gifted in medicine but with an unhealthy addiction for manijuana. K reminds me a lot of Tan Ah Teck's indian neighour, that guy. Harold is american korean, constantly being jabbed into his turtle shell by everyone else.

So the journey unfolds as we see harold gaining his confidence and k remains as kooku as ever.
Along the way, they ride a cheetah, become victim of battleshits, which by itself is an interesting concept, hand glide, get arrested, bolted out of jail, perform sugery on a gun shot patient, yadar yadar. you get my drift.

well, you either enjoy it or you don't. its like stephen chow. you either adore or detest him. i detest him.

my verdict - a vcd movie. hmm..i reword, a pirated vcd movie.

Neanderthals should be banished.

sigh. i am attempting to reblog because i am feeling very unsettled. I do not like the face that my thought were eated up by cyberspace. *swears again*
>>
i have so many thoughts today. i wanted to blog so many things. it did not help that blogger ate my previous post. my mind is like typhoon frances.

funfact : anyone knows the difference between hurricanes, typhoons and willy willy? I wrote the answer in my blogger-ate-up-blog, but i am now too pissed to elaborate. beg me and i will tell u.

Ever sympathtise with the intelectually-imparied? Don't. They do not deserve it.

Some people just do not have the same amount of braincells and synapses as the rest of us. To work with these imbeciles is excruitating. They make work inefficent and drag you down. Its like taking a step back for every two step ahead. MOM should like make everyone take a test and label these people neanderthal should they fail to attain a certain score. Needless to say, nanderthal should not be given work permits.

A neanderhtal joined as receptionist at the place where i toil 11 hours 5 days a week. Let me describe what she looks like.

N should be about 28 years old. N wears make up the way they teach you in 'makeup for idiots'.
N faithfully applies eyeshadow everyday, wears mascara and concealer. Oh, she wears framless eyewear too. Now who in the world will doll your eyes and wear specs? Duh. But then, the workings of a neanderthal vastly differs from ours.

N ususally dons a skirt, but she has to wear sandals with her skirts. Not tevas or nike sandals, as in sandals sandals. Oh Fashion Police, where art thou?

N's sole responsibilty is to pick up calls and meet courier guys. Simple enough. Nah, N has to make a mess of everytask assigned to her. Time is of essence is a delivery job and N is totally oblivous or perhaps cannot comprehend this fact. It is frustrating. When she has to enter description in the description field of forms, she enters numbers. I hear that a picture paints a thousand words but I never knew that number describes.

Anyway, the more I recount, my blood reboils. and remember, this is the second time i had to think about it since since blogger ate my first blog. *swears again* Enough about N.

Next.

I am aging. I was told that the collagen structure in my skin is dengerating. *wails* This symptom is for the above 30. I am way younger. Anyway, if my collagen is dengerating, yours has probably collpased. This is because, chances are I have better skin than you. And you know its true.

Dang told me today that he misses me. I think its the weather. dang said that because he misses me exceptionally today, he has decided to get me a jabra once i change my mobile plane to free incoming. Damn M1, i am still serving my two yr bond. Anyhow, i negotitaed with him and exchanged my jabra for lingerie. flirty lingerie is always nice. la senza is finally here...and hmmm..i decided i like rainy days.

long enough reblog. fwah. this better upload.

i am appalled.
i just finished one of my longest blog ever.
In it I talked abt neanderals , lingeries and other stuff..and it got lost in cyberspace because blogger had problems uploading it.
F***
in no mood to re-blog.

Today, 2 of Sir Issac Newton 3 laws were reinforced.

Law 1:Every object in a state of motion tends to remain in that state of motion unless an external force is applied to it.

Today was a good day. I went blading. After the initial jitters, I decided this was going to be a good blading day. I was gaining rhythm and getting less worried over humps and casurina seeds on the ground. Nevemind the fact that little tots on their tricycle were overtaking me. Hey, they are more mobile than me. All was fine until I reached the seafood center. I noticed they finally leveled the ground where the forever defunct crocodile farm was. I wonder, were there ever crocodiles there in the first place. For as long as I remembered, the place was like the imperial palace, gates forever shut. The authorities finally decided to lay a new cycling and blading path there. So, i went. I never expected that area to be so sloppy. I grunted my way up the slope and before I could give myself a pat on the shoulder, it occured to me - whatever goes up must go down. and down I went.

I was going down at supersonic speed, it was thrilling and somewhat terrifying. Sir Newton was all out to prove his first law. I never stopped ..till I decided I should find something to break my fall. I decided to crash right into dang. I crash. I fell.

See my wound . *ouch*



Newton's 3rd Law: For every action, there is an equal and opp reaction.

I crashed, landed on my knees. I looked up, I saw dang flying off in another direction. He flew to the grass, caught a lampost, went around it 3 times before screeching to a stop. It was darn funny. Like in a cartoon script. Bystanders were gapping but alas, no one helped.

I crown dang - SRS dang. (dunno what SRS is - look at the airbag in your car)

Being the garang me, I stood up, continued blading till I found water to wash my wound. I sat at the walkway, tending to my wound. Now, passer-bys were gaping at my wound and staring not so discreetly at it. I should have demanded they pay me for staring at my wound like I were some kind of public exibit.

Mothers were probably whispering into their children ears - " see this silly girl, never wear knee guards, now fall down .obigood"

Nevermind, had to blade my way back with gusto. and, I had to meet a friend who immediately chided me for not wearing guards. Hey, the guards were damn stinko k. I rather bruise myself. yes. I rather bruise myself.

Hmm..I better start investing in my own pair of guards,

Anyway, I had crab prawns and greenish stuff for dinner. It was fabulous.

There you go. My Sunday.

i had dinner at 11pm today. late you say? nah, its usually dinner at around this time on sats. and guess what...yes, its dinner at crystal jade HV again. i think i know all the dishes on their menu.
digressing, crystal jade is one of those places with an excellent food and throws away their menu after each guest.

anyhow, i ate a frog, a fish ,some beanskin and greenish stuff tonight.

i love frogs - today it was a live fog - or at least thats what the menu says.

i hate vegs - eating vegs is totally a overrated thing. I see girls who eat nothing but veg and are still fat. Girls that profoundly proclaim their love for veg. its disgusting. not that i have anytihng against the colour green. in fact, i think green is a lovely colour...but eating veg just amounts to eating cholorophyll to me. gross. and whats the crap about staying healthy by eating veg, you are probably just eating the insecticde off the veg. and abt aiding digestion, crap, when you need to crap, you will crap.

enough about greenish stuff.

i love meat - oooh..eating meat gives me the high. i'm not talking abt white meat, but red meat..ooh..just thinking about meat makes me slightly delirious.

anyhow, i can attest to the fact that eating veg gives you wonderful complexion and that eating meat spoils it is absoultely baseless.

most compulsive veg eaters i know have horrid skin. while this might be a sweeping statement, think about it and you will realise i'm about correct.

i woke up today and was hit in the face by an awful feeling - damn. 730am. Monday. I immediately knew what I had to blog about as I peeled myself out of bed. Same bedsheet still.

Crappy feelings
awww.many. where do i even begin.
- having to peel yourself off the bed at a ridiculously early time.
- planning to go swim but it rains or you at stuck at work
- feeling fat because you did not swim
- having things vastly different from what you expect
- wearing open toe sandals and it rains
- wearing shoes and it floods
- missing the fly by bus and having to wait till another eon for the next
- going to the ice-cream counter and they run out of chocolate icecream
- having the blech because you ate on an very empty stomach
- having to fart because you ate on a very empty stomach
- dragging yourself to meet people who you have tried so hard not to meet
- major disagreement with your sig. other.

Its a wonderful world when you
- peer out of the blanket and realising its still dark. meaning you still have shut eye time. yeah.
- swim when there is sun
- feel toned because you swam
- eat three different types of chocolate icecream. Belgiam, dark and plain chocolate
- get flowers unexpected from the right person of course
- sleep on fresh bedsheets.
- have the whole house to youself. Throw in the car and its ravishingly wonderful.
- icq the whole night on Friday.
- watch 3 different movies on a plane ride.
- get a new gadet to play with
- watch friends

and plenty more..

fwah. my mum fumigated my room. my room stinks now. i rather she sprayed insecticde.
i'm switching the fan and air con at full blast but fwah i never figured out what those ugly symbols mean on my air con remote control. oh, my door is left wide open as well. What a waste of electricity. whatever.*nose twitches*

and my mum was darn sneaky. she took that purplish bottle of dunno-what and started merrily spraying when i left my room for a toilet break. yet another reason why i need an attached bathroom.

yes, saturaday *dances wildly ard my stinky room*

dear all - i got guybrush to guestblog, *applause applause*

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hi to all! guybrush here, guest blogger for handsel's blogsite tonight...i realised that everybody does not really treasure what they have, till they have lost it. i know it's cliche to hear this, but experiencing it first hand, i feel it's no cliche after all...

i never believed in marriage. i feel that it is a commitment that is forever, with a burden that weighs next to infinity. how can anyone face another for the rest of his life??? impossible. to add salt to injury, kids will be produced as a by-product of the marriage. that sorts of adding to the already mountainous burden. besides immense effort and countless sleepness nights, the financial burden is excruciating.

however, after i have just gone separate ways with my partner, i began to rethink all the above issues. every kiss and every hug, is a projection of love, that is shared between 2 people. if the love persists, the commitment and burden will no longer seem forever and huge. but are we sure the love can continue? nothing is forever, the good things that is. at least, after breaking up, i began to realise the every little things we shared, the moments we went thru, the things we did, the places we went... are all pieces of puzzles that fit into a bigger picture.

the reason for breaking up is due to my belief that if i want to be single and free, with no commitment and burden, i should not have a partner. i will only drag her down, and causes her to waste her time with me. however, there seemed to be a tinge of regret broiling in me.

beginning to treasure all the past moments is a start for me, at least i will learn to fully appreciate all these moments if i go back in time.

i still have a long way to go to fully comprehend the logic and benefits of marriage, but i am on my way...
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i found it a tad bit depressing. my heart sank a little as i read. *sniff sniff*

its amazing and despicable what the media does. the media can be used to rally people for some cause(good or bad) or to make hermit crabs out of an entire population. it is somewhat orwellian.

Media story 1 - LJW and RS getting married.
wooo wooo..talk of the town. Glamorises table tennis and shuttlecocks. Quote from parliament today - " she looks up to the stands and see all races cheering her on. Sports rally the nation..blah blah blah". Whatever. . So propaganda. To me, its just sg way of justifying the hordes of money spent on the sport. We can easily do with more useless sheltered walkways. and oh yes, getting married, all in line with the romancing sg campaign too, she's young he is young and they are getting married....subtle msg to all young and old singles out there.

I wonder why everyone forgot to mention that once they walk down the aisle, she will get pregnant, do a JJH and wither in the tt scene. Perhaps the journalists forgot..hmm..i wonder.
Oh, one thing for sure,LJW will be having a ball of a time with R's shuttle-cocks- no pun intended.

Media story 2 - S.Koreans do not know troops are being deployed to Iraq
Yes, it is the same iraq that beheaded one of their country man. The K Government has implored the local media not to publicised the move to iraq. Their actions may be justified but it only emphasis the point that we are who we think we are. Our sg govt has constructed this huge umbrella over sunny singapura. At times , I wonder what we not know and what we think we know. It happens everywhere. The WWII chapter of the Japanese history curriculum would not surprisingly be less than adequate. MITA sifts through stacks and stacks of foreign articles to determine what we should know. Shudders.

Media story 3 - Creative is finally advertising
Creative - challenger of i-pods, the standard of sound cards, philanthropic CEO, has never advertised in all the years they done their business. They done exceedingly well. I'm proud to be Sg because of them and I can boast I work in the building next to Creative. They have started cheesy ads on TV and radio. This just reinforces the power of the media.

Media story 4 - Rice Table is fully booked this coming sat but no one turns up.
My turn to wield the power of the media. All readers- please call rice table outlets and make a reservation this coming sat and do a no-show. Their service sucks and they ought to be taught a lesson. Those who have dined or attempted to dine at rice table should agree with me. They conveniently decline reservations and walk-ins and are forever fully booked, even when the restaurant is visibly empty. They treat you like scum and their food is less than mediocre. May Rice table be empty this sat, and on second thoughts , sunday too.