Zones

I spoke to my boss recently and he says I fall into zones.

Zones where I am very happy and everything is pink and rosy for me and zones when I am depressed and everything stinks.

I never known myself to be like this. I asked Alboy and he says I switch between these zones often within the week. But I dont trust Alboy and I do not think my boss meant this on a weekly basis. I still have no idea. Do I fall into such zones?

Then, I reread my blog posts, I was so happy my last post but I cried or was the verge of crying for two days after that. Turns out that my boss offered me a position to stay with the company, and I am going mad just thinking what to do. I still do not know what to do. I get swayed right left very fast.

I know the decision is ultimately mine to make and consequences mine to bear, but I guess I just need that reasurrance from people that matter to me that I am making the 'right' choice, to encourage and be by me. I feel like I am being too troublesome but I can't help it.

The decision making just gets so much harder when you grow up. I guess thats what life is all about. I am glad that I be going on leave soon enough. Then, I do not have to go to work too much.

My birthday's coming, perhaps its time to switch to the so-called happy zone.
I wonder if people know exactly what they want on their bday. I don't. I never did somehow.

I guessed an external harddisk and computer will make me happy at this pt in time, but this is not what I want as a bday gift. Its just something that will make me happy because it pains me to spend so much money on it now. I am on a 'save money' campaign now. Save for what, I also dun know. Such are the ironies of life.

I thought abt it long and hard. What would be great bday presents?
- jewellery. Nice ones, I have to admit that I am somewhat taken by their beauty recently. I like staring at them. But I do not go out to buy them, or want anyone to buy for me, because they are so expensive and I think the money can be better spent

- bags. Nices ones, for all ocassions. Only girls will understand this. I never thought I be like this because most of my bags are ugly or I usually hold everything in my hands. Nice bags do not have to be expensive, I saw a few nice ones at some push-carts recently but I was never one to buy on impulse, so I left them on the pushcarts.

- facial and spas packages. To pamper thyself would be nice.

- Great company, great friends, great parties. What more can I ask for?