Long dreary post

So, I finally did it.

After hesitating, procrastinating, I finally completed my resume on jobsdb.
Since I graduated, I have only sent out a grand total of 5 resumes. 4 of them after I started working. Its disgusting really, I got my job with the very first and only resume I sent.

No, I am not proud of it. What goes around comes around. I have almost zero interviewing experience and am worry about future jobs. I didn't start on a very high paying first salary too. I graduated in the midst of the Iraq war and Sars, so most of us started low. Actually, on hindsight, it was not true. Quite a few of my friends were paid pretty well. The job was a 15 min bus ride from my place, and I was really too lazy to go through the whole job hunting process so I accepted the job. The job scope, or so I though, was somewhat similar to what I had in mind.

2 years on, most of my friends have moved on, i.e , found a better paying job. I lapse into depression in the middle of the workday more and more often. Thank goodness there is msn and people who always encourage me there. I have decided to be more productive instead of whining about not knowing what to do with my life. I sent out 1 resume today. I consider myself not an active job seeker yet, but will put in the effort to look at recruitment and send out my resumes.

I need a higher paying job. My current pay is pretty decent actually. However, I so need to get paid better because I want so many things and everything is so expensive. I hate the feeling of having to restrain myself as I so often do. Also, the feeling of your peers advancing leaps and bounds is nauseating. Most of my peers are on bonds, teaching bonds, ST bonds, Government Slaves, SAF slaves and their pay structure is presented before them. Given the regular increment rate my company gives, I will die of jealousy.

This internal turmoil had been brewing within me for some time. I am glad I filled up my profile on jobsdb and sent out one resume today. Dear all, please constantly remind me not to procrastinate and hunt for jobs.

On another note,

Chel was telling me how her boyfriend promises to work hard to earn more money so that she will not be a 'gao ling can fu'. High risk mum.
He is also changing jobs in seek of a higher pay. See, it all boils down to money. To work for job satisfaction is total BS. I firmly believe that a higher pay is positively co-related to higher job satisfaction.

I digress. Back to my point,
Both Chel and her bf are 27 this year. A young age actually. However, if they want to enjoy 3 years of couplehood before they have kids, they would have to like get married now. Like right now now now. Having your first child after 30 is considered high-risk, or so they say. It makes me think that the whole thing is a race against time.

I abhor that idea.

You get out of school at 23 and 25 for the girls and guys respectively. You have to work at least 3 years before you even have enough money in your cpf to put for downpayment for public housing. That is not factoring in paying off your University loans. Then, you have to furnish the house. This brings your bank balance back down to zero. Then, you have to rush to have kids before you fall in the high risk group. Assuming you have your firstborn at 30, and your second born at 35, you would have to slog till you are 60 before junior graduates. What a life.

Really, all I want to do is to be able to wake up as and when I like each day. Swim everyday. Groom myself well. Is that impossible or what. Rhetorical question I know.

I'm being very negative right.
Long enough post. I will stop.