Almost 2005

Yeah, I went to New Asia Bar today. Its been eons since I went to a bar or anywhere that made my hair smell so horribly of cigarettes smoke. Nice place, Great View. Lousy plastic table that kept moving though.

We were seated just next to the dj console and had the music full blast. It was way too loud. So loud it made screams inaudible.

Took tons of photos there. Am not going to show any cos I do not think my friends fancy their pictures online.

The last time I went up Swissotel, it was Westin Stamford and it was Compass Rose. I remembered we went in by the back door, through the kitchen because we took the wrong lift up. We drank some merlion drink and stole like 2 merlion figurines, 2 Westin Stamford figurines back home. I have one Merlion at home. I think Sam has one, Ben has one, and either Mingli or Emily has the other. It was hilarious. The waiters were supposed to give us brand new figurines to bring home, but we conveniently put into our bags the figurines that we drank from as well.

Those were the days. Think we were only eighteen then.

Yeah, New Year Eve's tomorrow, or rather today as its 3am now.
May the New Year bring on better things, and still, may Weiqiang be found.

Still missing

Gosh, Weiqiang is still missing. His story has surfaced in Straits Times and other media. Really hope all goes well.

I known him since I was 10. That's a long way back. Now the only thing I can do is to post his information on any online list, forums I can find. I am not sure if it will help, but at least its better than sitting back and doing nothing.

It is really hard to find any information online, the sg govt provides very scanty information about Singaporean victims. You would have to go to Thai sites to learn more, then again, none of us can read Thai.

I read reports after reports of the disaster. Its getting a bit of an OD. Its a mess everywhere.

I donated via dbs online banking. However, I have this feeling that my money will be used to defray administrative costs instead of reaching to the victims. This is why I have decided to buy a $10 food packet when I get to NTUC too. It hard to imagine that $10 is nothing to me, but it means a lot to others. All I have to do is to skip a meal or two, take the bus instead of cab, and that's my $10.

Note: Those of you who wants to donate via dbs online banking. Please make payment to "Red Cross Tidal Waves Asia". The consumer reference number is your contact number. You can also donate at ATMs.

Tsunami Waves

Last night I received an sms from kl saying that our primary school friend was holidaying in Phi Phi Island and is still missing. The embassy has found his gf but he is still unaccounted for. I am so sad, I just everything goes well for him.

I first heard news of the tsunami when I was speaking to Yumi. I went Phuket and Phi Phi Island with him years ago. He told me, " eh, remembered the chalets we stayed in? Now they are water chalets." I immediately dismissed him and he had to convinced me it was news.

Blame it on the fact that there was no newspapers on boxing day and I had not watched any tv as usual.

I felt this pang of grief immediately. I felt almost nothing when there was a bomb blast in Madrid. I have never been to Madrid. I didn't know how it looked like there. I couldn't visualized the extend of damage.

This is different. I have been to Phuket, walked the streets of Patpong , snorkeled at Phi Phi Island. Everything felt so near. It might sound a bit irrelavant, but it could have been me if the waves came earlier. They say, you have to be in the right time, right place. In this case, wrong time, wrong place. I met 50% of the criterion.

I immediately emailed Pat to make sure she was ok too. She goes to Phuket often for work. Thank goodness she replied my email and is safely in BKK.

I really really hope that Weiqiang is safe and sound.

The Wedding

I went to a wedding dinner tonight and I only met the bride and groom once before.

In short, I was the plus one. On the wedding invite, it was written "Dung and partner". I am that insignificant. Would it actually be so much trouble to find out my name??

I decided if I have to invite them to my wedding, the invite will be "Groom and partner". Fark.

That's beside the point. Why does everyone have to wear nice dresses to weddings?? My dresses are either too informal or way too short for weddings. I need a nice dress. But then, I think I need more than one nice dress because I cannot possibly wear the same thing to every weddings because you meet the same people every wedding. Crap.

I wore a tube and denim to the wedding today and I looked like I was going to zouk instead of going to a wedding. Whatever. Thankfully I think I have no more weddings to go to this year. I think the next wedding I would have to attend will be in May.

This brings me to another point, Why is everyone getting married!!!! *grits teeth*

Today, the bride and groom looked as if they were a JC couple instead. The groom is not too tall and the bride is short. I think she is less than 155cm. They look juvenile. The only other couple I think looks juvenile is Emily and her Nan.

At all the weddings that I attend this year, I have always been the plus one. When are my friends getting married? They should, so at least I know the wedding couple and more people at the table.

One more day

yikes, one more day. One more day before I roll up my sleeves and refuse to work for the rest of this year.

This would be my first break since I started to work. I cannot understand why my friends get so many leave days but its so hard to take leave at my crappy workplace. When you go on leave, the world looks at you like you are not doing any work. I do not have to go out of the country to take leave. I believe I can take leave because I do not want to work.

This brings me to another point, why is it that everytime you go on leave, or come back after the weekend , people ask you

"So where did you go yesterday/during the weekend?"

Why does everyone assume that you have to go somewhere??? When you politely tell them you stayed at home and did nothing, they look at you as if you have no life. Its like adding salt to the wound. People who stay at home do not want to be reminded they stayed at home. Crap

I resolve not to ask anyone the question, I will ask "Had a good weekend/ leave?" if I really have to make small talk.

Its coming!!!

I see that ICQ has reminded all 300 contacts on my list that my birthday is coming!!

I got msgs from Chippy (very irritating guy) and Qes (another very irritating guy) wishing me Happy Birthday. Both Chippy and Qes are friends and are in the Air Force. Both Chippy and Qes both think each other are irritating. Anyhow, Qes merely typed "Happy Birthday". Its not my birthday yet!! Be more sincere, put IN ADVANCE. But then, I should not be so demanding.

Yumi smsed me Happy Birthday too. and in advance. He is going somewhere and will be unable to wish me on the actual day. Yeah.

Last year I switched off my ICQ Birthday notice and no one remembered my birthday!! I felt it was pointless to have people whom I am not close to wish me happy birthday because ICQ told them to.

This year, I cannot care less. Yeah, I'm getting older!

All Red and Ugly

The past few days were a blur. I spent the last three days in bed. I fell terribly sick. I am much better now. The fever, runny nose, sore throat is now replaced by a intermitted cough.

BUT I now have swollen elbows and knees!!!

I had an allergic reaction to the medication. I broke out in mini rash all over my joints. You can see specks of blood just under my skin around my elbow and knees. I look terrible. My tights and knees looks as if you have applied char siew sauce to it. Worse still, I can't walk because its painful on my knees. Argk. I feel like Michelin baby.

I went back to the doctor in search for a cure but you know what, the doctor went on vacation. Are they even allowed to do that? Feed their patients some stupid cocktail of drugs so that they break out in rash and have to go back to you, and you conveniently forget about your money making scheme and go on holiday? Pui! I forgot to mention my doctor drives a Volvo Convertible too. GPs, do they really earn that much?

Then again, they should. Afterall, he charged me $44, a total rip off.

I keep staring at my ugly elbows and knees. I keep touching them too. The spots are actually very warm. Its like an exothermic reaction. Fwah.

I want my flawless skin back!! *wails*

Bling Bling.

Argk, I am sick again. I used to be very strong and seldom fall sick. Nowadays I fall sick like a wimp. Have a fever and my throat hurts. I felt so weak that I had to scramble home from work in a cab. Worse still, I still had to direct the clueless cab driver on the route to take. I seriously thought I was going to faint in the cab. Took panadol extra and my life is dependent on it now.

On to happier healthy things,

I realized yesterday that I actually like jewellery. When I was in my prepubescent teens, I never understood the craze my friends had for Bits and Pieces and Perlini silver. IMHO, the stuff they sell there were downright ugly. The only time I went there was to find presents for friends.

I thought I wasn't girl enough to like jewellery.

Yesterday, I realized I do like jewellery. They are so beautiful. Its just that the stuff at Bits and Pieces and Perlini Silver are so ugly.



See isn't this so lovely.

Jewellery cannot be given by anyone. Something worn so close to you has to be special.

I have been wearing this diamond necklace my mum gave me on my 18th birthday. Its a small diamond, and not the least bit eye-striking but I have been wearing it everyday. I only take it out when I go swimming. Once, I lost the diamond when I neglected to hook it properly. I went into a frenzy but found the diamond eventually.

Ok, I think I need to stop blogging. The effects of panadol are wearing out and my brain is collapsing. Till I feel better. Meanwhile, I love blings blings!

My Xmas Wish List

Because I am still in my depressed mood and refuse to write depressing entries, I have nothing to blog about. Writing depressing entries only serves to make one more depressed. So, Lef suggested I write a Xmas wish list, so here it goes.

I maintain that I am a simple person who really doesn't yearn for any single item, just give me a pool and swimming suits and I be the happiest person on earth.

Nevertheless, my wish list goes:
- I want a new pc with a big lcd screen. The lcd screen should be big and mounted on the wall. I will have wireless keyboard and mouse, so that I can surf and chat while lazing in bed. Throw in B&O sound system too please.

- PS2 and Xbox and N-gage. I do not game much. I played Crimson skies briefly and I kept crashing and I seemed unable to dodge the bullets. Nevertheless, I would be the envy of many because I have all the gaming platforms. I would then be more attractive to guys.

- Colorful bedsheets. They must be like a thousand thread count. Colorful bedsheets are important because they ensure sweet dreams. However, most colorful bedsheets are damn obiang. Its tough choosing the perfect bedsheet.

- A palmtop. I want the one with the fastest processor, highest memory, brightest display, chicest design. Then, I will be able to play bejeweled wherever I go.

- A king size bed. I want to be able to roll and turn in bed.

- A bigger room to fit my king size bed.

- To strike toto. I will then quit my job and learn how to grow my money. Working is just not me. I'm a Sunday child.

- Have cable in my room. I used to have cable in my room until my dad switched to Digital cable. He has since not wired cable into my room and I am limited to Ch5 only. I don't watch the mandarin channels anyhow. I want to be able to watch SATC in my room instead of in the hall. It is embarrassing when your parents are around when Samantha is shagging some guy. While we are on the topic, NO, I do not want a dildo. Lef keeps insisting I need one.

- Dobby. I need dobbies to clean up after me. My room is constantly in a mess that I gave up trying to tidy it. Where have all the house-elves gone? *sings to the tune of where have all the cowboys gone*

Xmas xmas xmas.....oh..did I mention, my bday is very close to xmas too.

Foul Week

I am fucking pissed right now.

I had not had a good week. In fact, I had the worst week of my life thus far.

My dad had a heart attack and was hospitalized. He was in ICU with all the drips and was hooked up to a monitoring system. I spent four nights there. They only allowed this one miserable cold hard chair in ICU, this explains my backache. My back is still sore. Fuck. yadar yadar yadar...do not want to elaborate in my foul mood.

Had a depressing week at work. Although it was only a 4 day week at work, I had no drive and motivation. Totally low morale and time crawled. It was miserable. Fuck

Was looking forward to meeting Dung but as usual he has so much work. I went home today knowing that I will die and rot in the office if I stayed there. He called me at 8 to say that he was leaving his office and was washing up. Already I was getting pissed, but nm. I am magnanimous.

8.30pm. Some blardy thingy went into my left eye making it all red and uncomfortable. I looked like the one red eye pirate. I had all this pent up energy in me. My eye still hurts. Fuck.

9pm, he called and said he just left. Fuck. 1 whole hour. 9pm. By the time he meets me, it will be 9.30pm, and we will land up with nowhere to go and nothing to eat. He will then be dead tired and sleep in my carpark. So, I said in a rather pissed tone, "Why not you just go home?". You know what, he AGREED but added he will go eat. So I asked where, and he said he was going Ikea to eat. Fuck. Firstly, regardless of what I said, his reaction should still to be to meet me. Secondly, how can he go Ikea without me. Fuck Fuck Fuck. I am so pissed.

I soften and asked him to meet me, he then told me that he had turned into AYE. Fuck. How can anyone make a turn so fast. Fuck.

930pm, I msged him, "I am very mang zhang. Was looking forward to meeting you. Fuck". No reply. Again, incorrect response.

In summary, I had a terrible week. Also, there are only 5 people online on my icq list now, it serves only to further jeer me. Fuck.

S Idol

I am blogging this on notes as there is something wrong with blogger.

It is now the half hour break before the nation crowns Singapore Idol.

My Malay colleagues have said that they will wear a paper bag over their heads if Sly wins.
Much as I like to see the big brown bag, I have to say Taufik is the better one.
Sly irritated the hell out of me. I cannot hear what he is singing. His words are all either mashed up or mispronounced. Totally irksome.

I may not speak Queen's English but Sly said "I saw it flew", in his defense when a stray light stick whizzed past the Judge's table.
I cringed. Its "I saw it fly, fly fly, not flew"
I repeat, Sly irritates me.

Then again, I will not vote. It is still imho a waste of money. I rather buy 4D.

Mediacorp artiste are terrible too. With the exception of a few, none of them refuse to reveal who they are rooting for when interviewed. This is crap. It is not as if you will lose fans if you pick either contestant. Come on, where's all the self confidence? I just feel like bashing their heads against a freshly painted wall when they sit on the fence. Grrr...


*************************************
Because blogger server is still down. Taufik is now Singapore Idol!!!!

I am so happy!!!
Except that moment that he passed the mike to Sly to sing his first single. Stupid boy, your fans voted for you, they want to hear you and you pass the mike to Sly. This is not the time to be sporting. Whatever.

I am so glad I will hear Taufik on radio. Yeah!

My oh My oh My Boooo

Have not blogged in a while.

Been in a slight depression. I was thinking that it would be yet another passing phase, but I plummeted deeper n deeper into Modor.

Its too lengthy to retell the tale, but the summary is
- I feel directionless
- I do not really know what I am doing
- I do not know what I want to do.

I came up with a few action items. I whined to a few people online and they probably know what they are. I cannot explicitly express myself, because I suspect more people are reading this that I know. Enough about ssh-shhh.

On a happier note, I decided I will learn how to use codecharge. I have been very lazy and thus unsuccessful. I will start in December. Tomorrow is December. So far, my only accomplishment is that I managed to find IIS on XP and now have a web server for publishing.

Also, I had lunch with Ben today. . Ben now has a red vios. It is an awful red. Its the splat red kinda of red. Take Nippon paint red and splash it all over your car. Ugly. I like red cars, but Ben's red was lackluster.

Lunch with an old friend is always good, you hurl profanities at each other knowing no one really minds. You condemn the same kind(race) of people, you have the same taste in food, you speak the same language.

Five things I learnt
- being vegetarian will make you less desirable to the opposite sex. My cousin is having second thoughts about a girl after he learnt of her diet.
- giving blowjobs will ultimately get you what you want. Read Candace Bushnell's Trading Up for more details
- N-gade QD has 8 in 1 pirated games in MMC cards. This rocks, because a single game cartridge costs around $60.
- I actually like Alicia Keys and Usher's My Boo quite a bit. I foresee my next song will be Britney Spears' Santa can you hear me..
- Boo originated from the French word 'Beau', it got mispronounced along the way and now is my oh my oh my boooo.

My Theory

Yesterday I came up with a fantastic theory.

As I roused myself in bed on a cold early Monday morning, a singular question raced through my head - "Why do I have to wake up to go work? Why do I have to work?"

I was thoroughly unhappy as I peeled myself from the bed, it was then I formulated my theory.

I had just realized a day ago that I was born on a Sunday. I was checking my users details on ICQ when I found out. I had always wanted to know which day of it week it was when I was born and now the mystery was finally solved.

I conjured in my little head that since I was born on a Sunday , I was not meant for work. Sundays are days of rest and only losers work Sunday. The rest of the world rest. So, since I was born on a Sunday, I figured that I was never meant for work. I got a little happier as I thought about it.

Psychoedd came online later in the day and I amused her with my theory. I think she must have dismissed it as yet another one of my weird ideas. Nevertheless, she checked and she was born on a Wednesday, middle of the week. I figured that like the day, people born on Wednesday just work, its neither a good or bad thing.

We then concluded that if you are born on a Sunday and it happens to be a public holiday, you would be blessed for life.

When two girls chat, the topic inevitably switches to guys. I told her that Sunday guys are not good because they are probably as nua as me. Friday guys are bad too cos all they think of will be to party, they would probably be flirtaous too. Monday guys have to work very hard because Mondays are the start of a long grueling work week.

It would be preferential to pick a Monday guy over a Sunday/Friday guy. Come on, who wants a useless guy.

Psychoeed got curious and asked which day Dung was born. I had no idea and she checked for me. Turns out he is a Monday guy. In Psychoeed's own words, "you are SO freaking accurate". No wonder Dung works 24/7. This explains it all.

Of course I told Dung. I think he has heard enough of my bizarre theories and has perfected the skill of indulging me before dismissing me. *goes giddy with joy*

The Incredibles

Yes, I watched The Incredibles on Friday.

It must have been 2 gazillions years since I last watched a movie on a Weekday.

I want to be a superhero!! Why aren't my parents superheroes in disguise?

I might then be able to run/swim very very fast. I can even disappear into oblivion whenever I feel like it.

I love The Incredibles. Disney finally got it right after their lackluster performance from the last few movies.

The Incredibles is fantastic.It beats Shark Tales hollow. Renee Zellweger and especially Will Smith's voice irritated me big time throughout the show.

There is Mr Incredible, a superhero who has incredulous strength. He uses cars and trains instead of dumbbells to build up muscles. His wife, Mrs Incredible aka Elasticgirl, is superhero too. She is like plastacine. She can mould herself into any shape, fit into grooves and stretch her body a mile long.

Of course, they have super hero kids. There is Violet, Dash and Jack-jack. Violet can disappear as and when she likes. She also can create this ball of force that shields everyone from bullets, explosions and all things straying into her path. Dash runs very very fast. So fast that his movements cannot be caught on tape. Jack-jack is only an infant, but has exhibited powers of fire.

Ain't that the coolest family ever?

I shall stop before I spoil the movie for everyone else.

I give it 20 outta 10. Go watch!

About Lef

hahaha...good old Lef raved about me in his blog. It started from a normal icq conversation,

C : yoyoo so glad u started to blog again
Lef : wahaha
Lef :but i dunno what to write again...
C : me is blogging now..jsut write whatever u want to write
write abt me..hahaha
Lef :okok
C :hahha...sure or not....
C :u say write then i write lor...........
Lef :wahaha
C :hahahaha......good good

and Lef wrote about me!!!!!

I am pretty sure he got into a lot of trouble with his other gfs with that entry.

Waaaa, most of the time, you can classify guys into a few categories (see one of my earlier post). They are either Bastards, Sore Losers, CMI, Try to hard, the list goes on. Lef is one of the very few who fits neither here nor there. You would have to create a special category for him.

When he shows me his photoalbum, he always takes photos with pretty girls. His convocation pictures are all with pretty girls. I am forever amazed how he finds all the pretty girls. I think he makes Kpoh and Des jealous. It is easy for a stranger to mistake him for a superficial creep but the truth is, he enjoys a unique and treasured relationship with each of this girls.

I have enjoyed a tremendous friendship with Lef. He gives me presents every year on my birthday without fail!! He has presented me with a telescope (I am still slightly awed by the magnitude of that gesture, although he claims that he went on a shopping spree because he was depressed).

During my first year in boring engineering school, Lef helped me with Graphics the whole semester. To those unfamiliar with graphics, it is this irritating module where they make you draw on isometric paper. They give you weird instructions and you are expected to follow. Sometimes, you are required to draw things from plane view, side view, whatever. As the semester progressed, things become weirder and they tell you that you have to draw blocks, sphere, triangles at precise coordinates, worse still, these structures intersect each other.

I hated graphics and sucked at it. Lef, on the other hand, aced graphics. Lef helped me with graphics week after week tirelessly. The point to note is that I did not bug and leeched onto Lef for help. He sought me out week after week to ask if I needed help, all the way until the final paper. I remembered he even insisted that I meet him a few days before the finals to make sure I was ok. I eventually scored a B+ for graphics and that would definitely would not be possible without Lef.

About Lef (in the same copied format)
1. Lef uses a very strong scented shower foam. Shucks, I momentarily forgot the brand
2. Lef has like 10 million guitars
3. Lef likes comics
4. Lef is always on ICQ
5. Lef's house is very big but has cracks on the wall
6. Lef smses everyone Good Morning, he goes "hi babe, good morning and ....". He words the sms as if he is smsing you, but he in actual fact is mass-smsing everyone.
7. As a result, Lef sms bills skyrockets.
8. Lef loses his handphone all the time.
9. Lef gives me the impression he eats a lot of MacDonald's.
10. Lef has been a wonderful friend, and will be. He is fantabulous although I wish he would take more than 3 minutes to bath. Grosskid.

My Inspiration

A colleague of mine spends $600 a month only.

*waits for reaction*

Well, before you pass any judgment. Let me include the fact that his $600 a month covers his $300 rent.
Do the math, and he only spends $300 a month.

Shocked?

He lives alone, has to buy groceries, toiletries, food, everything to sum it up , and he spends only 600-300=300 a month.
Woa. I easily spend $600 a month and I do not need to pay rent, or buy daily necessities. He is good.

I can't seem to understand why all my money went. Except for a few pairs of shoes, I think I indulged too much in food. It is an irony in itself because I actually hate eating. I eat only because I have to.

Then again, the counter argument is that I have been eating good these days. I dine so often at crystal jade that I know exactly what I want to eat before I reach the outlet.I used up all my UOB dining privileges too.

That layer of bubble forming around my waist must be my punishment.

My colleague in turns eats only vegetables. He is not vegetarian but all he orders for lunch is rice with 3 different type of greens. He claims that he wants to be healthy and that meat makes his stomach churn. Veggies with rice is also the cheapest combination ever. I secretly think that he would be eating all meat if meat were cheaper than veggies.

For dinner, he boils corn and veggies. For all the lack of meat in his diet, he is a 1.85m tall strapping guy. Very lean and with a extremely nice butt. His butt is very toned. I used to watch him swim when we were in school and my my my, he is eye candy. *drools*

I have crowned him MY INSPIRATION.

Now all I have to do is to start eating my greens(puke), stop eating at crystal jade, stop buying ice cream to eat, stop using food vouchers, stop eating desserts after dinner, stop buying bubble tea to drink, I might actually match his spending.

Amazing Race

Why are Americans so dumb? Why do they all think they can win the amazing race?

Take for example, old grandparents who vehemently believe they can win the race. Ohmygesh, oh pul-sease, It is impossible. You need a combination of luck, wit and strength to win the race. Stop daydreaming about the million dollar cash prize, you should have worked harder when you had the vigor.

Example number 2, father and daughter team. Again its about strength, poor old daddy will never make it. Unless you fathered your child when you were a minor, why not just watch the race from the comforts of your home.

Example number 3, couples who claim they want to build their relationship. Ok, so these people do at least have some chance of running the race decently. However, they usually land up screaming at each other half the time because they cannot read the map, the do stupid things like filling petrol into a diesel tank(happens every season), they jump at the chance to blame each other etc. They blame each other too quickly.

I am always amazed at the rubbish these Americans say, how they think so highly of themselves, how they all think they will win the race.
At first you think, woa, confident people. After some time, I think there people just do not know their limits. Thus, the cliché ,"Empty vessels make the most noise"

You see the fire and aggressiveness in their eyes, but really after 5 seasons, I know better and I scoff at them.

*clutches throat and bangs head on wall*

I need to blardy remind myself not to pick up calls from certain numbers.
I happily picked up my phone cos it is the first foreign number since I switched to free incoming.

Turns out to be vivace's husband to be, and suprise suprise, he is a financer planner. Argk.
I know vivace first, and even then, I am not even close to her. Much less the guy. Argk.

Anyway, he is not that fluent a talker, cos he spoke to me the 3 times I absent mindedly picked up the phone and he has yet to introduce himself as a financer planner. Whatever.

My nose is still leaking and my throat is still sore. Dorithricin like all other Western medicine is a scam.

Anyhow, in my wrecked state, I am going to meet Dung. Dung flared up at me yesterday for no good reason other then that he was pissed and irritated and I think he is trying to make up for it.

Argk

So, today is the last day of my 5 day holiday.

I ought to be delighted for such a break but somehow I am feeling different,
My head's throbbing because I slept too much. It feels like its going to explode. My throat is in agony cos I drank too little water on Saturday, yes, my throat is that sensitive.

Argk, feeling very lousy.

I am dumb

Waaaa....sobsob...

I did this test and my score is only 110. Asendoh scored 114. To make sure the test is not a fluke, I retook it but clicked A for all 39qns. It churned out a score of 80. 80 is an idiot's score. So, there is some basis in this test after all.

I went to the mensa webpage to see what 100 meant. It only meant that I was at the 50% percentile of the population. I feel so blardy dumb. There must be a lot of retards out there, and for that matter of fact, a whole lot of geniuses. I am so sad.

Not yet totally convinced, I went to this site, directed from the mensa website. I scored 24. Again, asendoh beat me by scoring 26. He is officially smarter than me. The canned msg churned was

"Thank you for trying Mensa Italia Preliminary Test!You answered correctly to 24 questions out of 33, therefore youhave good possibilities to succeed the actual Mensa test"

Another link later gave this table
Correct answers 33 32 31 30 29 28 27 26 25 24 less than 24
Probability 95% 95% 90% 85% 80% 75% 70% 65% 60% 50% very few

So, I only have a 50% chance of getting to mensa. This totally concurs with the result of the first test. Not that I want to get into mensa, but the grim reality bites.

In my weak defense, my parents were constantly nagging at me to hang the clothes while I did the test. Sigh. Whatever.

I am utterly sad. Only 50% percentile. Now, I will stop sprouting rubbish and stop insulting Neanderthals, for some time at least till i find some way of rebuking mensa. Sob Sob.

Deepa Raya

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M1 again -its getting boring

If you see a specks of blood at Bt Batok M1, that's mine. I vomited blood there, and you thought my ordeal with M1 was over.

So, today's the day my dad goes down to M1 to transfer his line. It is the last time his pesky daughter has to bother him over trivial little things like mobile line.

I went to M1 on the first floor, there was this botak guy bouncing around with a brochure in his hands. For the whole 30 minutes I was there, I couldn't figure out what his job function was. I presumed he was positioned there to assist customers in a bid to shorten waiting time, but all he did was to bounce from place to place like a half deflated balloon.

My Q number was 3117, it was 3111 when I received my number. Good, only 6 more to go, less time before hungry dad gets cranky because he has to wait. Well, turns out it took 30 minutes to get from 1 to 7.

Just as it was my turn to be serviced, the lady gave me a blank look, after explaining to her my case and asking her to pull up my records, she asked me, "so which handset are you upgrading to?"

Fwah. Turns out M1 not only hires inefficient staff, they hire deafs as well. I immediately switched to my throw-tantrum mode and blasted at her. Still, Patricia stared at me blankly.

Slowly, she seemed to understand and told me I had to go to level 2 customer service instead. So so so dumb. Of course I made a bigger fuss. I told Patricia that I wanted to be serviced immediately when i was at level 2. I didn't want to have to Q again. Patricia said no no no no , gave me crap reasons. I persisted and she disappeared into the room behind. She resurfaced later and told me I can go upstairs.

Seriously, the people at the booths for upgrading are terrible. They are like the one class higher version of the ah-bengs and lians touting used phones in neighborhood centers. Even with their orange uniforms on, they still look the same.

I went upstairs. The people upstairs were much nicer. Rosalind was nice although she too had to disappear into that little room. She told me at first that I would not be able to retain my Oki-Flex plan, that was not what Iris promised me. Rosalind disappeared once again. Later, she told me I could keep my plan but nicely asked me if I wanted to change my plan. I learnt from her that I would not have to pay 3months of caller ID if I switched to V100, so I switched.

I am now on free incoming, 100minutes free outgoing which in actual facts only translates to 50 mins free outgoing during peak hours and no sms. Its only $18.90. I figured that since no one calls me, and I call no one. This would be the best plan.

My mum gave me a sorrowful look and teased me endlessly when I told her no one calls me. Ok, so now that I am not entitled to free sms, unless you are a Singtel and Starhub user, you can almost forget about me replying your sms. Call me instead. I still do not understand why there is not free sms website for M1. Yet another silly M1 thingy.

Gosh, I hate that so many of my blog entries are about this M1 saga. Its terribly boring. I hope this is the end of it. Lets hope M1 keeps to its word when I get the bill later in the month.

M1 replied.

So, M1 did reply

Dear Ms Ong

We refer to your e-mail dated 1 November 2004 and our subsequent conversation on 5 November 2001.

Ms Ong, we acknowledge your concern regarding the transfer of mobile line 97924125 from your father's name to yours. We have reviewed your request and we will accede to your request as an exceptional basis.

The registered customer, Mr Ong can request to transfer the mobile line at any M1 Customer Service Centre. Both the transferor and the transferee have to be present and must bring along the following:
- The transferor's original NRIC
- The transferee's original NRIC

As spoken, the following terms will be extended to you:
- Proration of the handset contract from date of transfer until contractexpiry on 14 May 2005.
- Existing SunPerks points will be transferred into your new account- 45% Bonus Discount for the first year

Ms Ong, we hope you understand that while we will try to assist you as much as possible, we are unable to accede to all your requests. We thank you for providing us with the opportunity to provide you with further service.

If you have other queries, please contact our 24-hour Customer Service Hotline at 1627 (+65 96801627). Alternatively, you may send us your query/ feedback via the link below. http://csfeedback.m1.com.sg/jsp/email.jsp

Yours sincerelyMobileOne Ltd
Iris Lim
Customer Relations
For more information, please refer to www.m1.com.sg

Turns out that Irene is on maternity leave so Iris called. Whats up with I-names, although i-pod is absolutely cool. The new i-photo is even better, although it has less of a practical function imho.

Well, M1 says that they will keep my 45% discount for a year before reverting back to the discount scheme as if I were a new customer, 35%. I think its crap. Either way, I will just get the name changed and see how things go later. I think their computer system will not be smart enough to remember the change, else I will jus change price plan.

Now, the tough part, convincing my dad to visit M1.

I'm dead beat. I went bowling today. Wait, I am dead beat because I had a long day and not because I went bowling. I reread the flow of sentences and realized that I would appear horrifically loser if I were tired because I went to bowl.

Back to bowling, it was appalling. I have not bowled in years. I used to bowl regularly when Ben was in AC's bowling team. He would constantly make us bowl. Thankfully, he weaned out of it.

Then he was hooked to billiards and snooker, and we went ever so often. Till this day, I am still slightly fearful of those ever so forbidding Chinese gods at the entrance of the cigarette filled, dimly lilted underground places. Ben now has a gf, so he spends all his time humping like jackrabbits so he now only looks us up occasionally. Enough about Ben.

Methinks me wants to sleep. Nights

Seven things put me off.....

1. Chinese pop music. Just how many 5566s , Jay Chou, Ou De Yang, F4s can you have.

Although I have to admit that Dao Ming Si is pretty cute. I reword, Dao Ming Si is pretty cute only in meteor gardens. I turned into this pussy during some heart wrenching episodes. Yes yes, I can hear you all murmuring to yourselves and condemning me to damnation.

I cringe when chinese pop is blasting from the radio sets in the taxis that I sit. Good thing it only takes 50 minutes max to travel from Jurong to Changi.

Oh, Jamie Yeo pisses me off too, and while we are on it, Glenn Ong is no better. What a match! I used to enjoy the Late night show with Glenn, I even emailed dedications hoping they will be read. Once it was and I whopped in delight.

Now, Glenn irresponsibility sprouts rubbish on air whilst claiming that he has the freedom to aire his views. Oh pulease, with the power of media in your hands, you are influential. I hope Glenn gets fired like Shiek Haikel.

2. Smell. I hate the smell of certain spices, especially those the Malays and Indians use in their food. Ouch. My noses twitches the whole during my malay colleagues eat in.

I rather have Dung fart in my face.

I detest the smell of cigarette smoke too. How can anyone get addicted to something that smells so foul? Worse, add the smell of cigarette smoke to the spices and its a double whammy.

3. 3 ply tissue. Its a waste of material. Because it is so thick, my lips always feel slightly bruised.

So, take out 1 ply and use only 2 ply you say? But what do you do with the remaining 1 ply? I hate it when my mum rips off the 1 ply to give me when I ask for tissue. The 1 ply is too useless for anything.

3 ply tissues are only good for cleaning you arse after a good shit.

4. Relatives. My relatives are like the uncles and aunties in the market.

They all act like they know better how to discipline you and have to add in their two cents worth. They think I will listen to them when I do not heed my parents. They act like they have the power to talk sense into me.

Wake up, if I do not agree with my parents on certain issues, you no-value-to-me relatives will not succeed either. Fwah.

5. Malay guy with phone number 91599579. Please spam him with calls and sms. Your call.

He has been calling and sms-ing me in malay. Its always the "Sayang I miss you, Saya cinta padamu Amy, " and other gibberish malay. The girl in question Amy seems to be spurning him, then again, all his msgs go to me not Amy.

I have rudely screamed at him, sms-ed him my limited malay, which equates to 'awak bodoh machiam barbi, saya amy ta, berhenti sms saya'. My malay not bad eh. Actually if you notice, they are simple words that I learned off signboards and pieced them together. Its like doing zhao ju.

Still, malay guy keeps calling and sms-ing. I even got my malay colleague to scold him, and yet he continues to sms me immediately after.

I hope amy leaves him. Dumbass.

6. Having to shit and realizing that your mum is bathing and would take another 10 minutes. Coupled with the fact that your parents think that one storeroom is not enough to keep junk and have to convert the other bathroom into a storeroom.

That is the dumbest thing ever. My mum is convinced that if we use the toilet in her room, all the urine and shit atoms will surface and float around the room.

7.M1 for obvious reasons. They have yet to get back to me after requesting for my patience. It has been 2 days. I decided my PATIENCE lasts 7 days.

Getting short-fused these days. I guess it happens as you age.

Canned replies are not polite but infuriating.

Look, this is what M1 replied.

Dear Ms Ong

Thank you for your e-mail dated 1 November 2004.

We thank you for taking your valuable time to write to us pertaining to your feedback on transfer of ownership policy. We are currently reviewing your case and will keep you informed on the outcome.

We appreciate your patience. Please rest assured that we would contact you soonest possible.

If you have other queries, please contact our 24-hour Customer Service Hotline at 1627 (+65 96801627). Alternatively, you may send us your query/ feedback via the link below.

http://csfeedback.m1.com.sg/jsp/email.jsp

Yours sincerely

MobileOne Ltd

Nuryusman

Customer Relations

It is obviously a canned reply. Its funny how I wrote to Irene , Assistant Manager, and Nuryusman replies. I suspect my email was intercepted along the way by the mail handler or perhaps Irene too does not value me as a customer.

You think M1 will reply me positively? I think they are toying me around their little finger.

M1 is pissing me off

I finally wrote in to complain to M1 yesterday. My mobile line has been under my Dad's name. I was not 18 at the time of registration then and did not want to have to pay the silly $50 deposit. I have been wanting to have it changed so that I own the line.

However, M1 adamantly insisted that I would lose all my loyalty discount and perk points if I do so. Seriously, I care nuts about perk points. Its a scam because they are never enough to change for anything. Loyalty discount is a different matter, it shaves a substantial enough amount off my bill.

I composed my email and sent it off. Today, a Mr. Nuryusman called me and after wasting 5 mins of my talktime, informed me that he could not do anything. I supposed it is one of M1 ploys to add talktime into your phone bill. Foreseeing that I would probably be at work and thus inconvenient for me to answer calls, I had clearly stated in the complaint form that my preferred mode of communication was via email.

Anyhow, what Nuryusman did was to repeat "I understand, but there is nothing we can do" for 5 minutes. Hey, I did not submit a complaint to have someone who is not empowered be the punching bag of my grouses. I want action. I blatantly told Nuryusman that I would have no qualms about changing to another mobile operator and he told me there was still nothing he can do.

I was incensed. I mean, I do not even feel valued. I have been with M1 for 7 fucking years, despite the fact that Singtel obviously is the better service provider. I knew Nuryusman could not do much so I decided to send in another complain email when I got home.

Well, M1 beat me to it, Assistant Customer Service Manager sent me a survey rate requesting I rate Nuryusman's level of service. It was a fill in the blanks survey, I did not fill in the blank but instead wrote an email back. This is what I wrote:

Hi Irene,

Nuryusman was courteous and pleasant over the phone. However, I wished that your customer service representatives are more empowered. I have written in to complain about my dissatisfaction on some of M1 policies.I am a user of a M1 mobile line.

The line is registered under my dad's name because I was not 18 at the time of purchase. I am 24 now. Having the line under my dad's name has posed much inconvenience to the both of us. I could not upgrade/make changes to services and plans. A letter of authorization will not suffice and my dad has to go down to M1 personally before I can upgrade my handset. It is frustrating.

Nuryusman has given me options, all of which I have considered prior to writing my first complain letter. None of which is enticing. What I am requesting is for M1 is a change in subscriber name. I want to own the line, without losing discounts and perks points.M1 does not allow me to do so. I have made it clear to M1 that I would have no qualms about switching to another mobile operator once my contract period is up. Still, M1 insisted that there was nothing they can do.

I am aghast at M1's response. It did not make me feel that M1 values me as a customer. This is the same response I get from other M1 staff. In fact, this happens everytime I want to upgrade my handset without my dad's presence.Price plans among different operators have been very competitive, I would think that one has to value customers to keep them with you.

I am still requesting for the change in subscriber's name. Irene, I am hoping that you can accede to my request.If not, please refer me to someone more appropriate. Having to wrestle with M1 over my request is tiring, and it is making me lose faith in M1.

Regards
Cindy

I have a nudging feeling nothing with happen. I hate to be ignored. Rest assured I will complain all the way up. I wonder just how arduous the process will be. It is only a matter of time that I join Singtel.

Bunches

Today as I was walking home, I noticed the sky was grey. Grey. Usually, the sky is just blue, white or dark to me. It was grey today, I was slightly terrified. It was as if some old grandfather's unkempt moustache was covering the sky.

It has been raining and raining these days. I love the rain. It brings the temperature down and I get to wear all my long sleeve tops that I never wear. When was the last time you saw me in something long sleeve, or with sleeves?

I thought of a new phrase on the bus today. Its "I love you bunches"

"I love you", "I love you lots" , "I love you forever" , whatever is overused. Everyone says it. It is dull and outdated. So, I decided " I love you bunches" will be the new phrase.

I smsed Dung the phrase this morning and he was slightly amused and he thought that I had gone mad because I shitted too much this morning.
I had taken it upon myself to describe to him in the most intricate details about my shit ordeal. It was fantastic. It was the half watery totally stinko kind of shit. Dung says that the amount of shit should be proportional to the size of the person. He added that it was alright for a cow like him to shit and fart a lot but not me. Crap. I shall shit as much as I want.

Anyway, as I was saying, "I love you bunches" was refreshing. I had too much time in the day later to ponder and I decided to call Dung "Bunches".

Then, Dung would be able to stand out from the crowd of " dear, dearie, darling, dar, dar dar, ling ,ling lin, sweetheart, sugarypussy".
Bunches is a good name. Of course I told Dung, he protested at first cos he thought it insinuated that he was fat. What a vainpot!
See, once Dung is Bunches, the phrase "I love you Bunches" will take on a second meaning. Its like code phrase for "I love you Dung"
Dual meaning. How cool!

I sold Dung the idea, I got over excited and added that " Dung the Bunches" sounds good too. And like Pavlov dogs, I conditioned Dung the Bunches to say "hi" in this high pitchy voice when say "Dung the Bunches". It was fun, for a while at least.

Cindy: "Dung the Bunches"
Dung: "Hiii"

Cindy " Dung the Bunches" (in low frequency noise)
Dung: "Hiii"

Cindy "Dung the Bunches" (in lower frequency noise)
Dung: "Hiii"

Dung still insisted that it was the shit that gave me this high. I think he secretly enjoyed it too.

A stroke of Brillance

I came up with a brillant idea.

I have been buying more and more shoes, and it has become tiring trying to find my shoes at the common shoerack at home. So, I have decided to keep my shoes in their original boxes. To avoid confusion since I mostly buy my shoes from the same few places, I will take a photograph of each pair of shoes and stick the photo to the box for identification.

Brillant eh. I am so proud of myself. It is seldom I think in such an organised manner. Now, the hard part is not to procrastinate.



See my first picture.

Will use the laser colour printer tomorrow to print.

Evenings are getting boring. Everything someone see me, they will ask "waaa, how come you are going home/at home?"
For goodness sake, I have been going home almost everyday after work. Why does everyone think I throng the streets of Orchard every night? Why does everyone think that I go clubbing everynight? Infact, I seldom club. When was the last time you hear me say I clubbed?

In fact, I have been most dormant. Its getting very irritating. I am starting to feel very restless. I want to go swimming after work, but the lack of sun and public pools totally put me off. I want to travel but I'm always stuck. I am begining to think that Dung is subconciously stopping me from travelling. One day one day, I will run off without having to adhere to his schedule. *grits teeth*

Yippe, I like my new blog layout.

No doubt this is the first custom layout in the blogger page, I like this layout enough to use it. I like the circles and the use of colours. Thanks to Douglas Bowman. The other blogskins on third party sites are simply too troublesome to use and usually plagued with viruses.

Who cares if a million other people is using this layout? *fwah*
Don’t you think the circles on this blog layout resemble my earrings too? The circle ones.

Anyway, I lost all the comments written in the previous blogs because I switched from haloscan to the inhouse comments provider. Some people whine a lot when they lose things that once upon a time meant sometime to them, I don’t. I enjoy throwing away things. I used to keep greeting cards from years ago from all my friends, but now I just discard them. No point clinging on to the past I figured.

Will slowly decorate the layout.

Today I learnt a shocking fact. Remember the Neanderthal I complained about? Today I found out that she has only primary education. She did not even make it to Secondary school. No wonder she is so dumb. She must have failed all the way to primary 8 before finally giving up. I thought dumb people do N levels. I do not even have a proper adjective to describe her dumbness level.

How can anyone with primary education turn out so bitchy. It baffles me.
Without a certain education level, you cannot even qualify to say that you are educated. If you think about it, at 28, N cannot even be compared to your mums and dads. Word has it that she married a NUS researcher. Must be some balding, fat, ugly guy. If she has kids, it will effect to the nullification of genes.


My friends all have at least a polytechnic education. Most of them are geniuses though.
I know I sound totally arrogant and cocky all the time, but hey, I think I have the right to. Its my blog and also although I may not be like those geniuses who complete their PhD in like half the time, I know I am not dumb.

Time to decide if I should go eat mango ice-cream. I hate eating after brushing my teeth for the night.

20 minutes to blog

Ha, I switched the television set on all ready to watched America Next Top Model but it doesn't start till 10pm. Apparently, there is true files or unsolved case or whatever on television. That leaves me 20 minutes to blog. Yayayya, I enjoy watching ANTM, its absolutely bitchy, they catfight and the girls are so bimbo. Even the judges are bitchy too. Tyra has a receding hairline in my opinion and I swore I looked at her from every angle, and my verdict still is that she is not the least bit pretty. I have never seen a younger picture of Janice Dickenson but she is ugly too.

Yay, Just heard thunder. I love the rain. At night especially.

I finally did my claims for my BKK trip. Woa, I actually spent quite a bit despite my earlier silent resolution that I will not buy anything. I spent almost 200SGD on myself.

I bought like 20 over pairs of earrings. Dung said it isn't too much because a girl can never have enough accessories and shoes. See, that's why I still fawning over him.



Nice right.

I bought lingerie too. Its so beautiful there. And its 60% off. Wonderful stuff. Women's secret here is always overpriced. I bought a few other useless things too. A fake Man U jersey for my brother, it was overpriced. I knew the guy was making a blast off me, but I didn't feel like bargaining partly because he spoke good English and because he was nice to me. He was handsome too.

I bought useless stuff too. Like a top which I couldn't wear because the fit was so bad. Like the boxers with the horny devil prints all over it for Dung. Dung found it tight. Big arse I say. Nevertheless, he paraded in it for me. Oh, I spend money on a half hour foot massage as well.

It was a guy who massaged my feet, strange, I would have think it would be a girl caressing my leg instead of a guy. I say leg because the foot massage extends all the way to my knee. He did a 20minute massage instead of half hour. Also, I do know what he did, my feet was extremely painful after that. Its either I clipped my nerve when I slipped after the massage. I slipped because my feet was so slippery and I simply couldn't grip my sandals. Either that or he did some funny things to my nerve.

I was practically limping to the airplane gate. I tortured myself even more when I walked to the wrong gate because of my stupidness. I mistook the seat number for the gate number and this resulted in me trotting the whole length of the airport.

Ok, my 20 minutes is up. Time to indulge in ANTM.

yoyoyoy, the bkk girl is here.

So, I did go out last night. I went to Siam Square, one of the featured article in the papers. I actually pored over the article but my thai collegue brought me out instead.

The advantage of having massive land space is that all your shops can be on ground level, and you can afford to walk around and get lost at every turn, which in itself is not a bad thing because you see something new at everyturn. I did not even bother to find my bearings, I just walked and turned and walked.

SS is a bit like the streets in Japan, except that its much cheaper. Earings were going for 15B a pair, that is too cheap. It is like 6 times more ex here. I should have brought everything, dump it into my luggage and sell in sg. Even if they do not sell, I would have enough earrings to last a lifetime. I might even have to pierce more earholes to be able to wear them.

I got meself two tops too. I decided I will give them away if I do not like that. They always look so good on display but when I eventually tried them when I got back to the hotel, it was dissapointing. The material was even thinner after it stretched across my body. Its the kind of thin that makes your bra visible.

Its either I got fatter or the top was too thin. I blame the top, obviously.

Oooh, I took the sky train and MRT here too. After Japan's web of trains, nothing is too difficult for me. The trains are quite alright actually. You will have no idea that you are in BKK because you are underground.

I used 4 towels to dry myself after my bath yesterday. I feel like a king. It was a fantastic feeling.
Its like using a different towel for each limb. 4 towels a bath. I am so proud of myself.

In BKK

yyooyoy, handsel is utterly lost in translation in bkk. Actually its not that bad, but since this is supposed to my outlet, allow me to exxagrted it. It would be more fun reading this way too.

I am placed in a hotel quite far away from the rest of the world. okok, it is not that far, but it certainly looks isolated on the map. My bkk office admin boasts that there is Robinson and Carefour nearby. Why in the world would I want to do in Robinson and Carefour? Methinks it is her way of scoring points for being able to place me in a cheap location. Only SGD 48 a night, inclusive of ABF, how wonderful can that get?

Enough grumbling. I am supposed to be upbeat.

Thankfully for people like guybrush, pally and even my dear cousin to keep me company and listen to my whines via the power of the internet.

BKK is seriously cheap. I cannot find a way of saying that without acting like some rich swine, but seriously, it is dirt cheap.

Meals are on the average 20Baht, which is like less than a single sgd dollar. I took a cab to the hotel from the airport, I waved a 500 baht bill to the cab driver and he recoiled in shock. It was as if the note was that terrifying. Friends have told me to live it up and pamper myself. However, I find myself with no urge to buy anything. I learnt from previous shopping lessons in BKK, that everything adds up, and that most of the time, you land up buying things you never use back home.

Anyway, my little eye spys a lovely lingerie shop in the office building nearby, perhaps I will wander in and sing a different tune later.

Oh ya, its vegeterian week in BKK now, wtf, whats up with it? Also, they are running a energy saving campaign, so all major malls have to shut by 9pm. huh? What about econmical sense? I figured that as long as the tourism board does not advertise this fact, tourists will still flock in. Everything's so cheap anyway.

I wonder why I will go tonight, BKK can get a tad scary at night. It feels like there are people prowling at every corner sometimes, I think I'm slightly paranoid but then cliche as it may be, better safe than sorry.

Anyone wants anything from BKK? Let me know.

Mama mia ...here I come again...

Today I asked Dung, What age do you think it's a good age to be?

He replied instantly, "Newborn".

I stared back wondering what he will sprout next. He said in all earnestness, "because they get a lot breast". He elaborated that if he were newborn with the mentality of an adult, he would be happiest. He said he would start wailing each time the nipple is taken away from him.

Man. Sigh. *heaves*

I later cajoled him into answering my question again. This time he answered, "Now" with affirmative and conviction. "Now is the time I am the Man that I will become". Something to that effect. He said it in a more grandiose way. I was slightly swooned over when he said this but I kept a straight face. Very charming indeed, or at least I thought so.

I have always wanted to be older. Slightly older so that people will take me more seriously. I know that when I am slightly older, I will want to be younger. So, I am not thinking so much about it. I just feel that now is the age where everyone around you treats you like some green horn and dished you away. I suspect there is a more elaborate underlying reason to why I feel this way, but I do not want to go that far to probe why.

Emi wants to be 18. She thinks it's a good age to be. I think its because her crush is 18 and she finally realized how bloody old she is. Pedophile. 18 is not a good age to be. Sure, you can buy cigarettes, drink and go pubbing legally. I enjoyed the time when I was 18 or rather I enjoyed the times I remembered I was 18. I now classify all 18 years old as young punks. Yes, that was how long ago I felt 18 was.

Watched Mama Mia today.

Buy the CD instead. Its about the same. ABBA sounds better. Much. I didn't enjoy the musical, even though I paid for top dollar seats. I thought the lead singers went off-keys and were screaming instead of singing. The ploy was weak IMHO.

Act one was the day before the wedding. Sophie reveals that she invited 3 man who might be her father to her wedding. It turns out that Sophie secretly read Mum Donna's diary. Donna had 3 romps with 3 guys consecutively. Donna herself does not even know who the dad is. It went into a confusing song and dance about almost nothing.

Act two was the day of the wedding. Song and dance again. It was sometimes funny but largely slapstick. The best part was when Donna's sidekick dangled a fish and when "pepper my snapper". Obviously none of us poorly read Singaporeans caught the joke. Thankfully Dung and I were slightly wider read and I swear that we were the only two people in the audience, minus the ang mohs, laughing. Anyway, the musical ended with Sophie decides not to marry her groom. Her groom was extremely happy about her decision. Sophie was happy too. In a twist of events, Donna landed up marrying one of the three guys. Werid. Marriage always is depicted too lightly. Tsk Tsk.

In short, forget about the musical. Get the CD. Its about 10 times cheaper too.

Man, I was supposed to pack my clothes for BKK but yet I procrastinated again. WTF. I will just pack tomorrow. I need not be so hard on myself.

Jaywalking is not as bad as it seems

Man, this is the first time I am blogging at work. Correction, blogging after work hours but in the office. Blogging with Lotus notes.

I have no idea what those goons in my office do after 530pm. I assume that some are nincompoops and take very long to complete their daily tasks, other feel that long hours are directly proportional to a measure of how good you are , some have no lives. Perhaps some of them are trying to avoid their spouses at home. I wonder.

I decided I should stop using the word dang. Too many people I know are referring to it. I want the luxury of having the name to myself. From today, I will refer to him as Dung. Forgive the lack of creativeness.

Today I emailed chat a friend. Let's call him Caterpillar. Caterpillar's getting married at the end of the month. I told him that marrying scares me and he ironically commented that one should not marry too young and he is scared too. Caterpillar is only two years older. I wish him all the best.

Bolting out of the office now
**************************
Fast forward, remembered I bolted out of the office. It is now a day later.

I just watched Sg Idol Everytime I watched it, I feel like changing my TV set. I always wonder why I feel the same way everytime. The idols, or rather contestants , were sorely lacking. It was painful having to hear them sing. Sigh.

Today I jaywalked. I normally don't . In my defense, I had a gnawing feeling that if I walked the 100m to the traffic light, I would have missed my bus. And, I was darn right. The bus arrived out of nowhere as soon as I jaywalked. It was as if it were the midnight express. I hate having to wait aimlessly for the bus. I tried reading/smsing at the busstop, but the results were always disastrous. The bus will become oblivious of my presence and conveniently zoom pass me. I have resolved never to do anything else but be on the prowl for buses at busstops.

For those of you who drive, you lucky bastards. You probably are clueless to the public transport system.

I re-emphasis my point in my earlier entry. I wanna be a superhero. Life will be more exciting without having to worry about missing buses.

lalala, engerizer bunny

Yoyoyo, Handsel springs back into action. *dong dong dong* Think energizer bunny heartily drumming away.

I been to KL and back, got a new pair of shoes, cut my hair. Not bad eh. But I also think I got fatter.

About KL, I eventually drove up to KL Did anyone see the KL tourism board advertisement? It's the one where Asher Gill stars in. In the advert, they play wonderful music, you see frame after frame of glamorous Asher partying in clubs, shopping in really nice malls , spending time at nicely renovated coffee joints yadar yadar.

You say to yourself, wow, what a wonderful place. Afterall, it is a very vibrant ad. Beats Australia Ad, I have no idea but Australia seems to be after the grey dollar instead. So, if you are ang mo, you will probably fall in love with this truly asia place and want to visit KL.

Thankfully I know better than those silly Ang Mohs. That city is a mess. The city is an inane representation of the ad. Everything seems dusty there. Dark characters lurk around everywhere. Traffic is lawless there. Officers of the law are constantly on the prowl for a bribe. We had to pay a 60rm bribe to get pass the causeway. It is absolutely disgusting. It is times like that that I am so thankful I'm Singaporean.

Then, in all fairness, I have to admit that I only venture like a 200m radius from when I stayed. I was stuck in a gaudy meeting room all the time. Needless to say, they did not bother to provide us with any drinking water.

Sigh.

To happier things, I love my new pair of shoes. Actually, I loved the way I got them. I had to get a new pair of shoes on Sunday because I found out last minute that I was going to dine with class and all I had on were my lovely red reefs. I hate having to be forced to buy something, plus my head was spinning because I was insufficiently rested.

Thankfully, I have my fashion consultant aka manslave with me. He loves shopping. So all I had to do was to sit on the couch, wait for him to pick out shoes for me , try them on, wait for a verdict and finally pay for one pair. Fantastic way of shopping. I feel like a diva. Wooohoo.
I love my fashion consultant/manslave

I wanna be a superhero!!

Yes, I want to be a superhero, don't you?

With the exception of Poor Peter Parker and Superman and a few more, Superheros do not seem to have to work. They lead exciting lives, seem to be impervious to pain and never fall sick.

Plus, they get exciting outfits to wear. Think me in sultry Catwoman Bodysuit. *meow*

And yes, I want to play with whatever gadgets they have. Be it the Earth, Fire, Water, Wind, Heart rings, Batman's automobile, Donatello's staff, Harry Porter's invisible coat, Yoda's force, you get the drift.

The odd thing is with the exception of captain planet, I watched most cartoons in my adult life. SBC 5 had to air them on Saturdays morning and mornings were always too early for me. I rewatched Star Wars recently and wooo, I love the light saber. I want one too. I want to be able to leap from building to building, spin webs, travel fast, have absolute strength, the list goes on.

Don't you love it when you superhero saves the day? *Handseldreams*

Ok, Jolt back to reality.

I am sick. Fwah. I hate being sick. When I fall sick, my swim timings drop when I recover. I always become slightly out of breath after that.

My nosey has been leaking like the spoiled tap in my bathroom. I been cleaning n cleaning it, soon MJ will have a nicer nose. It does not help that I feel darn weak. My head feels like its space is being quashed every moment.

Also, it is not helping that there is a resident mosquito in my room. Darn, how do mosquitoes even fly up so high in the first place. Everything seems to be falling out of place, why am I not a superhero? *wails* Superheroes lead fantastic lives.

Reminder: Panadol Cold is a scam. It is most ineffective. They just pack Paracetamol in it. Paracetamol, the wonder drug for everything, after aspirin, Viagra and Cialis.

Seriously, all western medicine does is to relief the symptoms, numb the sense and nothing else. Think about it, it's a ploy to make us continue popping the pills and it generates revenue for them. Everwonder how migraines evolved from headaches. No doubt, it's a term coined by one of those big drug factories.

Chinese medicine is completely different. Although I am a bit disgusted by some who try to turn treatment into a business, most are still fine. They give you one bag of blackish stuff, and make you brew and brew it until nothing is left. I love the bitter taste of Chinese medicine, it beats the plasticy capsule taste.

Eitherway, I just want to recover. Crap.

Spizza and Haagen Daaz

Today was a strange day. Nothing much happened but it feels as if it were a summersault ride.

I spoke to Swat on ICQ today. So happy. It was just a brief conversation before I was hurried to eat dinner, but speaking to your crush always makes you happy. Now, stop gapping, yes, dang knows that swat is my crush although the details are somewhat hazy.

Swat has been my crush for the longest time. In fact, I too think that years ago, I was his crush too. Do not get me wrong. I refer to him as my crush out of sheer convenience. Over the years, we have reached this silent understanding that nothing will really happen between us. He is happily attached now with his lawyer gf and I have my dang.

I shall not go into details about his lawyer gf although I was quite indignant when I found out about it. I had to mask my look of absolute disgust when I first met her, not to mention that I knew her beforehand. Why had it to be her of all people? *spats*

Anyhow, talking to swat always makes me happy. He isn't half the memory I keep etched in me though, he is somewhat different now. Older. It does not matter, I thoroughly enjoy the friendship we have now, and perhaps one day many years later, we will talk about it and laugh at our foolish young selves.

On a different note altogether, dang was depressing because he always has to work so hard. But he always makes up for it in his unique way.

I was getting slightly frustrated because he was terribly weary during the day. Insanely ridiculously I admit , but I couldn't help feeling this way. I know dang sensed the shift in force because he called to say he wanted to meet me.

We went to Spizza and later Haagen Daaz. Sidenote: Service at Spizza deteriorated. The crew of Indian workers simply could not manage an increased crowd size.

It was at Haagen Daaz that I almost flared up. I consider myself a docile person. Very little things make me angry. Sure, I get pissed at plenty of things but pissed is only a temporary sensation.

Dang ordered a waffle with tiramisu ice-cream, a flavour I do not eat. I poured the heresy sauce into one cube of the waffle, while he drizzled the rest of the sauce over the waffle. The cube was mine. Clearly mine.

Dang indulged in his waffle and suddenly, as if to mock me, he scooped the tiramisu and dumped it into my cube. I was enraged. It was such a deliberate act. I was looking forward to that cube of chocolate-soaked waffle all the time. It feels as if something precious was snatched away from you.

Oh also, I paid for dessert that I did not get to eat because dang did not have cash with him. Wtf. The staff were profusely thanking him as we walked out. In their sickening sweet voice "Thank you SIR, Thank you SIR"

Grrrr.. notice how eateries always thank the male and totally ignore the female, even if she paid for the meal instead. It happens all the time, everywhere. I hate it.

Thankfully dang has his ways of making me happy again, but largely because I have a huge soft spot for him, the intense situation was eventually diffused.

I am hungry now. Got to find food.

Handsel on leave tomorrow!

Yeah!!! I’m on leave tomorrow!!!! *dance wildly across the room*

For the record, I have only taken two days of leave so far. The first was when I had to go for my convocation and the second was to go star gazing.

My itinerary tomorrow? Bum around and go swimming. Handsel is intoxicated with happiness. *breaks into yet another wild dance*

Plus, I will be going to KL and BKK soon.

Accommodation in BKK is really cheap. It is like 900BHT/night. Its 32BHT to 1 USD. Do the math yourself. I will be housed in Siam Beverly Hotel. Sounds like Beverly Hills accommodation? I WISH!!!

The website advertises this:
· Individually Controlled Air conditioning
· Private Bathroom with hot and cold water and both bathtub and shower
· Television with in-room movies
· International Direct Dial Telephone
· Mini bar
· Refrigerator

Woa..sounds like any other hotel eh. That’s what I’m worried about. The marketing industry is unscrupulous, be forewarned. If I were a guy, the apt description would be "scared till my balls shrunk" , and thankfully, I have no balls.

I cannot imagine what it feels like having your scrotum hang out of your body. I can picture guys telling me "nah, its part of the body", but come on, be truthful, most guys treat their dick as an external object, lavishing it with tenderness and not to mention, constantly stroking it. Some penises I know even have names. *wink*

Anywhow, I have decided that I will be upbeat about my coming trip. This is despite of the fact that I may have to drive up to KL and take a budget airline to BKK. *crossly my fingers tightly that I get a decent flight up to BKK*

Cheese Fondue and Aphrodisiac Cake

I had cheese fondue over the weekend at Swiss culture. It was different but nothing fantastic. A pot of overpriced melted raclette and some other cheese, the pungent aroma of good cheese was sorely lacking.



looks yucky right.

The waiter was a dumbass. He looked a bit like Bernard Lim but was trying to hard to act smart. There was a condescending look on his face when he took orders. It was the "oooh, yet another bunch of destitute fools."

I ordered a cheese and mushroom pasta in additional to the cheese fondue. He looked at me and gave this incredulous face. "Its cheese again", he said in a mildly irritated tone.
Obviously I realized. What, am I blind??? I can eat up all the cheese hills in the world if I want to. I glared at him and gave a resounding yes. He proceeded to scribble it on his miserable order form, I’m dead sure he must have dismissed me as yet another dumbass bimbo. Hey Waiter, read the papers, the school I went it is like officially top in sg now. Sidetrack, I have never seen so many medal of honors and a full page report dedicated to RV in the papers before.

When the cheese fondue was served, waiter went "All you have to do is to dip the bread in the cheese and eat, Very simple". I retorted when he went away " yayayya, else what, shaft the bread up your ass is it".

I hate dumb people.

I had a more pleasant dinning experience on Sunday.

I have to applaud big O for both its creativeness and chessy-ness.
Dang ordered a Rueben Sandwich, and it came in the shape of a heart. Muahaaaa.
Those who know that big O has been appointed as one of the official speed dating place will not be surprised. I was utterly tickled. Imagining eating a heart. Worse still, imagine a nervous guy asks a girl out for the first time, and he gets a heart for dinner. The guy might just pee in his pants out of sheer embarrassment.

That was not it.
There was an aphrodisiac cake – the official "Romancing Singapore" cake.
Surprise, it was in the shape of a heart. It was a very very yummy chocolate truffle cake.

And the best part of it all, big O forgot to charge me for the cake and the ice-cream.
Free Dessert. Now, how much more wonderful can life be!

Sex and the Handsel

I had many things on my mind. I wanted to blog about how the trees in the carpark were pruned yet once again, how things had a way of coming back to haunt you , how much I despise people dumber than me yadar yadar. However, I asked Pally what I should blog about tonight and he replied SEX. Sex and the Handsel.

We then proceeded to a short but rather intriguing (at least to me) session about sex. The contents of which I have sworn to secrecy.

I feel sex especially in my part of the world has been demonize as a disgusting and sinful act. We were taught to fear our sexual desires as the hand of the devil. Remember the scornful look on your relatives faces when there is a shotgun marriage. No one here talks about sex openly, if you do, you probably sworn your confidant to secrecy, the way I have been asked to many times. I look around at my friends and I assume they are all virgins, but assumptions remain assumptions. The initial shock when I learned the truth has become yet another jaded fact over the years.

Afterall, Durex is celebrating its 75 years of safe sex. A survey recently conducted by them revealed that people have sex an average of 127 times a year and that almost three quarters of us are happy with our sex lives. It’s the Eastern Europeans who are the most sexually active with the Hungarians, Bulgarians and Russians all topping the 150 mark each year. And while the Americans are well below the global average when it comes to frequency of sex, they’re still seen as one of the world’s sexiest nationalities – second only to the Brazilians Forty five per cent of people have had a real life one night stand, although virtual reality sex by phone, text or e-mail is clearly a growing phenomenon. However, this new techno trend is still no substitute for the classic turn on of sexy underwear, lubricants and sex toys.

A little known fact. Durex’s slogan is "For a hundred million reasons". How apt.
What so bad and fearful about sex? I do not know. Perhaps this is why SATC shone at the Emmys.

Marriage is the union of two people. Historically, intercourse was the act through which the male and the female experienced God. The ancients believed that the male of spiritually incomplete until he had carnal knowledge of the female. Afterall, it was only by commuting with a woman that a man could achieve a climactic instant when his mind went totally blank. All this had nothing to do with eroticism. Nirvana was described as a never-ending spiritual orgasm.

I think sex is good. One day, I want to be able to have great sex and be able to proudly tell all my friends, with full knowledge that this will not make them look at me in a different light.

* Certain ideas in this entry came from Dan Brown.

Someone closed to me once remarked that I am an unhappy person deep within. I shrugged it off and continued smiling. I punctuated my text msgs with many exclamation marks and greeted everyone with a very enthusiastic 'hi'. However, the fact was that his remark resonated in me for days.

I was not prepared to put this down in black and white, but what’s the point of having a blog when you are fearful to show your feelings.

Today, a whole series of unhappy events unfolded. They came crashing like a how cards stacked in a pyramid would. To elaborate the events would be too painful and it would only make me cry, already I have small eyes.

The aftermath of it was that I admit that I am a very unhappy person within. My closer friends will silently nod their head. Others will want to read on.

I am the by-product of strict disciplinary style parenting and the excellent sg educational system. My parents are disciplinants, never wrong and always act in the best interest they think would be for me. I grew up to be a very guai girl. However, as I grew older, I felt increasingly stiffen by their grip of control over me. I wanted to roam free but could not. Because deep down inside I am darn afraid of my parents (I still am), I started to rebel in the most ridiculous way. I was never brave enough to speak with my parents. It did not help that I become verbally constipated when I face my dad. Part of me thought it would be futile to do anything constructive about this, the other part of me was resigned. This had devastating effects on our relationship.

Do not mistake me. I love my parents dearly. They have done a lot of me and I would not be where I am today.

The educational system that I was subjected to also left me with little space to breathe. I HAD to excel while growing up. I went to top schools, took the most difficult subjects. Society is judgmental and we were regimentally judged by papers. I enjoy learning new things but gradually, having to learn because of an exam was tiring. When I reached tertiary education, having to learn complicated formulas became grueling. I felt I had no choice because I had to stay on the right side of the educational system. Afterall, I had struggled for so long and had come so far.
Increasingly, I gasp for air.

I want to do what I want to do, instead of what I have to do. You say, why not – just follow your heart. I tell you, it is not easy, I dare not. Blame it on a combination of the person I am and the experiences I had so far. I simply do not dare. Silly, isn't it? Considering that I have no inkling what I am afraid of.

Perhaps one day I will get it all figured out, and hopefully it will not be too late then.

p/s: If you are going to leave a comment about this entry, please do not preach. I will hate you.

Harold and Kumar go to White Castle

Monday. Pudgy Monday.

Instead of complaining of how the work week is going to suck, I will focus on all things good.

My weekend was mediocre. I watched Harold and Kumar go to White Castle. Heard of it?

Harold and Kumar go to White Castle. Lets put it this way, it is a american pie wannabe. The dialogue is crude, witty and lame - the whole thing is like mash pototes.

In the show, there are 2 leads, and yeah, you guessed it Harold and Kumar. Kuuumaar with 3 u's and 2 a's in it. Kuuumar, as how the americans will accentute it.

Now you ask, so whats the plot? yeah, you got it right - going to white castle. *rolls eyes*
That basically sums up the entire show. Harold and Kumar go to white castle. Easy enough.

To the ignorant, white castle is like ke ai ji here, except that they sell mide size burgers, supposedly so savorous and tantalizing that H & K had to have it. Mind you, white castle is a real fast food chain in the US. www.whitecastle.com

So, H & K travel to whitecastle. K is a sterotyped indian, gifted in medicine but with an unhealthy addiction for manijuana. K reminds me a lot of Tan Ah Teck's indian neighour, that guy. Harold is american korean, constantly being jabbed into his turtle shell by everyone else.

So the journey unfolds as we see harold gaining his confidence and k remains as kooku as ever.
Along the way, they ride a cheetah, become victim of battleshits, which by itself is an interesting concept, hand glide, get arrested, bolted out of jail, perform sugery on a gun shot patient, yadar yadar. you get my drift.

well, you either enjoy it or you don't. its like stephen chow. you either adore or detest him. i detest him.

my verdict - a vcd movie. hmm..i reword, a pirated vcd movie.

Neanderthals should be banished.

sigh. i am attempting to reblog because i am feeling very unsettled. I do not like the face that my thought were eated up by cyberspace. *swears again*
>>
i have so many thoughts today. i wanted to blog so many things. it did not help that blogger ate my previous post. my mind is like typhoon frances.

funfact : anyone knows the difference between hurricanes, typhoons and willy willy? I wrote the answer in my blogger-ate-up-blog, but i am now too pissed to elaborate. beg me and i will tell u.

Ever sympathtise with the intelectually-imparied? Don't. They do not deserve it.

Some people just do not have the same amount of braincells and synapses as the rest of us. To work with these imbeciles is excruitating. They make work inefficent and drag you down. Its like taking a step back for every two step ahead. MOM should like make everyone take a test and label these people neanderthal should they fail to attain a certain score. Needless to say, nanderthal should not be given work permits.

A neanderhtal joined as receptionist at the place where i toil 11 hours 5 days a week. Let me describe what she looks like.

N should be about 28 years old. N wears make up the way they teach you in 'makeup for idiots'.
N faithfully applies eyeshadow everyday, wears mascara and concealer. Oh, she wears framless eyewear too. Now who in the world will doll your eyes and wear specs? Duh. But then, the workings of a neanderthal vastly differs from ours.

N ususally dons a skirt, but she has to wear sandals with her skirts. Not tevas or nike sandals, as in sandals sandals. Oh Fashion Police, where art thou?

N's sole responsibilty is to pick up calls and meet courier guys. Simple enough. Nah, N has to make a mess of everytask assigned to her. Time is of essence is a delivery job and N is totally oblivous or perhaps cannot comprehend this fact. It is frustrating. When she has to enter description in the description field of forms, she enters numbers. I hear that a picture paints a thousand words but I never knew that number describes.

Anyway, the more I recount, my blood reboils. and remember, this is the second time i had to think about it since since blogger ate my first blog. *swears again* Enough about N.

Next.

I am aging. I was told that the collagen structure in my skin is dengerating. *wails* This symptom is for the above 30. I am way younger. Anyway, if my collagen is dengerating, yours has probably collpased. This is because, chances are I have better skin than you. And you know its true.

Dang told me today that he misses me. I think its the weather. dang said that because he misses me exceptionally today, he has decided to get me a jabra once i change my mobile plane to free incoming. Damn M1, i am still serving my two yr bond. Anyhow, i negotitaed with him and exchanged my jabra for lingerie. flirty lingerie is always nice. la senza is finally here...and hmmm..i decided i like rainy days.

long enough reblog. fwah. this better upload.

i am appalled.
i just finished one of my longest blog ever.
In it I talked abt neanderals , lingeries and other stuff..and it got lost in cyberspace because blogger had problems uploading it.
F***
in no mood to re-blog.

Today, 2 of Sir Issac Newton 3 laws were reinforced.

Law 1:Every object in a state of motion tends to remain in that state of motion unless an external force is applied to it.

Today was a good day. I went blading. After the initial jitters, I decided this was going to be a good blading day. I was gaining rhythm and getting less worried over humps and casurina seeds on the ground. Nevemind the fact that little tots on their tricycle were overtaking me. Hey, they are more mobile than me. All was fine until I reached the seafood center. I noticed they finally leveled the ground where the forever defunct crocodile farm was. I wonder, were there ever crocodiles there in the first place. For as long as I remembered, the place was like the imperial palace, gates forever shut. The authorities finally decided to lay a new cycling and blading path there. So, i went. I never expected that area to be so sloppy. I grunted my way up the slope and before I could give myself a pat on the shoulder, it occured to me - whatever goes up must go down. and down I went.

I was going down at supersonic speed, it was thrilling and somewhat terrifying. Sir Newton was all out to prove his first law. I never stopped ..till I decided I should find something to break my fall. I decided to crash right into dang. I crash. I fell.

See my wound . *ouch*



Newton's 3rd Law: For every action, there is an equal and opp reaction.

I crashed, landed on my knees. I looked up, I saw dang flying off in another direction. He flew to the grass, caught a lampost, went around it 3 times before screeching to a stop. It was darn funny. Like in a cartoon script. Bystanders were gapping but alas, no one helped.

I crown dang - SRS dang. (dunno what SRS is - look at the airbag in your car)

Being the garang me, I stood up, continued blading till I found water to wash my wound. I sat at the walkway, tending to my wound. Now, passer-bys were gaping at my wound and staring not so discreetly at it. I should have demanded they pay me for staring at my wound like I were some kind of public exibit.

Mothers were probably whispering into their children ears - " see this silly girl, never wear knee guards, now fall down .obigood"

Nevermind, had to blade my way back with gusto. and, I had to meet a friend who immediately chided me for not wearing guards. Hey, the guards were damn stinko k. I rather bruise myself. yes. I rather bruise myself.

Hmm..I better start investing in my own pair of guards,

Anyway, I had crab prawns and greenish stuff for dinner. It was fabulous.

There you go. My Sunday.

i had dinner at 11pm today. late you say? nah, its usually dinner at around this time on sats. and guess what...yes, its dinner at crystal jade HV again. i think i know all the dishes on their menu.
digressing, crystal jade is one of those places with an excellent food and throws away their menu after each guest.

anyhow, i ate a frog, a fish ,some beanskin and greenish stuff tonight.

i love frogs - today it was a live fog - or at least thats what the menu says.

i hate vegs - eating vegs is totally a overrated thing. I see girls who eat nothing but veg and are still fat. Girls that profoundly proclaim their love for veg. its disgusting. not that i have anytihng against the colour green. in fact, i think green is a lovely colour...but eating veg just amounts to eating cholorophyll to me. gross. and whats the crap about staying healthy by eating veg, you are probably just eating the insecticde off the veg. and abt aiding digestion, crap, when you need to crap, you will crap.

enough about greenish stuff.

i love meat - oooh..eating meat gives me the high. i'm not talking abt white meat, but red meat..ooh..just thinking about meat makes me slightly delirious.

anyhow, i can attest to the fact that eating veg gives you wonderful complexion and that eating meat spoils it is absoultely baseless.

most compulsive veg eaters i know have horrid skin. while this might be a sweeping statement, think about it and you will realise i'm about correct.